Marriage Vows- Not Supposed To Be Broken
I never have to watch any more serial programs about the dramas of life. I am living in my own drama. I realize that this life drama I am living in has been created by me and I attempted to take control of the events in the story. The plot is obvious and the sequence of events are predictable in the beginning. But then there is a twist in the plot somewhere in the middle. I see that some characters come and some will go. Some will be challenged; Others will be pushed out of the story eventually, or so I thought, as I have been the creator of this story..
This serial of events of my life, as seen on these hub pages, are in need of a continuance. I can not just let the plot of my life go. I have already gotten you interested. Some of my fans are on the edge of their seats, wondering, Is the guy going to leave or is she going to go? So here I am, in another eventful hub to tell you the rest of my story.
RECONCILIATION
I had it all mapped out in my head- work my overtime hours so that I can pay rent at a new place. I went online to look for another apartment to live by myself. I really had a desire to be by myself.I thought I had received blessings that were not really to give me the motivation to go. But my best girlfriend, my pastor, and my own husband warned me that I was going to fail, and each one of them claimed that it was the Lord telling them to tell me, "Don't Do It!" meaning, Don't leave my husband, move away and even leave my church ministry.
This experience left me shaking and I literally broke down, felt scared for my life, and lost all the warmth in my body thinking I am making a big mistake. So I phoned my spouse, during this physical-emotional trauma, and confessed that maybe perhaps I was wrong and too hasty. Perhaps I needed to see it in the way that others who had tried to advise me. I realized that I really do love him and I would do nothing but miss him if he was gone. What also helped calm and allay my fears is that I read my own hub, "Only God Can Heal a Marriage- Transition Starts With Love." I reread 1 Corinthians 13 over and over. After I asked God for forgiveness and confessed my love to my husband, I felt better. I decided that I would give it another best try. Again.
My Own Abraham Experience
In the Old Testament in the Bible, there is a story of Abraham who one day was told to sacrifice his son, named Isaac, as a burning sacrifice. He prepared him, took him into the wilderness for three days, and then with the belief that God told Him to do this. And God allowed him to go through all the steps in preparing to take his son's life as a demonstration of his obedience to God. Just as he prepared his son, Isaac, and came very close to ending his life, God stopped him and told him NO! When Abraham stopped to listen to God and Stopped when the Lord told him, The Lord rewarded him. He experienced a stronger Faith in God from obeying the Lord.
Just like Abraham, I was in the belief that God was in my decision to move and end the marriage, even after God told my spouse that he should be obedient to his vows. Just as I was on the verge of leaving, God spoke through my spouse and told me not to go ahead with my plans. I realized that I had just changed the plot of my own story. By doing what I was told to do through God's Message by someone, I am like Abraham who stopped sacrificing his own son.
Twenty four hours later, I felt a burden lifted off my shoulders. I am at greater peace now as I have been in a long time. And there is now more expression of affection in my home with the spouse whom I LOVE, and I am a fool to have ever wanted to leave him. He is still extremely attracted to me, too.
REMEMBER GOD'S PROMISES
The Word of God is on the table for the reason. We hear it when we enter the house of worship and we try to remember the passages when having an intelligent conversation that calls for His Word to be heard. My new goal in this marriage that feels fresh and new again is to open the bible and read His Reminders of what He has blessed us with.
EPHESIANS 5: 22-29
"Wives, submit your own selves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord; for the husband is the head of the wife, just as Christ is the head of the Church, and he is savior of the body; Therefore as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives as even Christ loved the Church, and gave himself for it So that He might sanctify it by the washing of the word; that he might present it to himself, a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle,or any such thing; but it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men should love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife, loveth himself."
Ephesians 5: 31
"For this cause, shall a man leave his father and mother and shall be joined unto his wife, and the two will be one flesh."
Renewing Those Wedding Vows.
My goal now in this marriage is to be more supportive, and to not be so stubborn. My husband wants to forget about the immediate past. "No record of Wrongs." I actually have felt this warm rush in my head when I hear him say, "I love you." So my goal is to say that more often. As for the intimate part of the relationship, well, I feel young again as I anticipate what is between just us two. We have the Lord in our favor and we have been forgiven- by each other.
Letting Go Of The Vow- a poem
Wedding vows were meant to be
Forever gone, but not forever free
We said "I Do" - but now you "don't".
To try again, but you say, "I won't."
The things that need improving
Can not be solved in one day.
The love that needs to be proven,
Will it be strong in Faith to pray?
No matter what we struggle
Only God can fix-
Is it true that our
Wants and needs
Don't mix?
copyright @ 2013 CMCastro