Women Fishing-Never With My Wife Again

Women Fishing-The Beginning Of The End

First of all this story is totally made up about women fishing. It is my rendition of a day of fishing with my wife. I can write this because I know how much she hates fishing and after 21 years of marriage I know what would happen. Any references to ladies that may seem unfair or prejudice are all done in fun.

I know the sport has come along way and many of the top fisher people in the world are women. So please don't write me back telling me how you want to cut my knacks off or anything like that. The entire hub is meant in fun and is kind of a starting point for my series of hubs on fresh water fishing.

So sit back and enjoy.

Women Fishing-The Morning

Okay, I told her that I wanted to be on the road by 5 in the morning. We had a one hour drive to the lake so then we could be fishing by 6. That meant we had to be up at 4. To me this meant I had to be up at 3 just to try and have her out of bed by 4.

So now 6 has come and gone and she has finally stumbled out of bed. I'm trying to be nice, I'm trying to be patient. In fact I am biting my tongue so hard I can feel the blood inside my mouth. I sat down eagerly with her to have a cup of coffee but the last straw was when she told me she would only be 45 minutes taking a shower, doing her hair and then her make up. I insisted this really wasn't needed but guess what? I lost, she walked out the door looking good enough to go to the prom.

Anyways I guess it was about 8 when we finally got in the truck to go fishing. I kept reminding myself to shut up if I wanted to avoid an argument I knew I would lose. Now she wanted to stop and get a coffee for the road. I would have been okay with that if she wouldn't have insisted on going to the coffee place clear across the other side of the city in the opposite direction we were going.

The one hour drive reminded me that women fishing just shouldn't be. All the way there all she could yap about was if it was going to be too hot, too cold, too windy and she kept asking how long we would be staying. I let her rant for an hour which seemed like 10. finally at 11.45 we arrived only almost 6 hours late. Oh well I thought, may as well make the best of it, that was it for the morning.

Women fishing and lunch
Women fishing and lunch

Women Fishing-The Afternoon

I finally thought I was going to forgive the thought that women fishing wasn't for me until??? That's right. I was happy. she was in her lawn chair, I had interruption free fishing for an hour. I should have known it was too good to be true. So here's how things went.

She told me she was cold and I needed to go get her sweater from the truck. I did that without getting angry. Then she complained because the cell phone service didn't work where we were. All I could think was this was good because then she wouldn't be able to call 911. The biggest kicker was yet to come.

Now she told me she had to pee. This should have been easily solved for the simple reason there was an outhouse about 50 feet away. Nope, that just wasn't going to do. She insisted she had to have indoor plumbing. The nearest public rest room was 5 miles away at the tourist information booth. So I packed everything up, made 2 trips to the truck and we were off.

I thought half hour tops we would waste. Hell no!! I couldn't be more wrong. Once there she wanted to look at all the little displays and brochures. It was like a little museum inside there. Then she saw the restaurant, well I knew I was doomed then. It was time to give up. I asked her if she wanted to stop and have a burger. I'm sure you all know the answer to that question. Well here we were pulling back up to the lake at 4 in the afternoon. I guess I still had the evening fish.

Women Fishing-The Evening Fish

The entire day was almost lost now. I only had about an hour of fishing left before we would have to leave. At this point women fishing was never going to be allowed with me ever again.

The last hour was good. The wife sat in the truck because she was cold. I caught about half a dozen walleye. At least I got that out of the trip. It was finally time to go home. I was irate and I just wanted to lose my cool but instead I just listened to her babble all the way home.

I really wasn't paying attention. I could just hear noise as I thought about how I could have drowned her earlier without anyone ever finding out.

We finally pulled into the driveway. I let her out of the truck and rehearsed my blow up as I parked the truck in the garage. This was going to be a goodder, I could feel it but I knew it was something that had to be done.

I stepped into the house ready to unload.

Women fishing is the best thing around
Women fishing is the best thing around

Women Fishing-The Final Straw

As I walked around the corner ready to blow my top she walked up to me and put her arms around me. She gave me a huge hug and kiss. I really wasn't sure what was happening but was sure I was about to find out.

I asked her what that was for? She responded by telling me it was because she was so happy that the two of us spent such a wonderful day together. She told me she would cherish every moment and thanked me for allowing time to do some of the things she wanted.

She thanked me for not rushing her in the morning, taking her to the indoor washroom, taking her for lunch and for the rest of the day.

I couldn't believe what was happening. A moment ago i was going to find my shovel and dig a shallow grave in the backyard and now I had somehow given her a perfect day.

Like I said none of this story is true but I know it is exactly what would happen. My wife can come fishing with me anytime she wants and as for women fishing, guys it's really the best experience in the world.

Feel free to checkout my blog at Women Fishing.

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Comments 31 comments

Army Infantry Mom profile image

Army Infantry Mom 7 years ago

Your a very patient guy,...Good story Dale,...LOL


Dale Mazurek profile image

Dale Mazurek 7 years ago from Canada Author

The truth is my wife is a very patient lady and I love her for it.

Thanks for checking in. i hope all is well with you and your family.


Useful Knowledge 7 years ago

Dale, I thought I would check in on you and see how things are going in your world:) This hub is very funny and so close to the real world. I know my husband must feel that way about me sometimes. He is always ready and waiting on me to finish my hair and put on my make-up, when we are just going to Wal-Mart. However, we always manage to hae fun together.

I can tell you are a wonderful husband to your wife.

You are such a creative writer.

I really enjoy your hubs as well as your personality around the forums. Thanks for being such a great person! You really do shine through your writing!


Dale Mazurek profile image

Dale Mazurek 7 years ago from Canada Author

What a wonderful compliment and I thank you very much.

I do love my wife very much and that's after 21 years of marriage.

I am glad you are enjoying my hubs. As a marketer I made a promise to yes market through HubPages but do it in a way that's not threatening or in a way that does not portray me as a spammer.

I think so far I have done that. Once again thanks for the great compliment. It means a lot

Dale


christine almaraz profile image

christine almaraz 7 years ago from colorado springs

That was awesome. Great writing. I look forward to more. Great job.


Dale Mazurek profile image

Dale Mazurek 7 years ago from Canada Author

Thanks for the kind words. I really do appreciate it and I will for sure have more coming out shortly.


dineane profile image

dineane 7 years ago from North Carolina

LOL - my husband would probably claim that he can relate, but the truth is, the only part I'm guilty of is not dragging my but out of bed so early. that's the only part of fishing that I don't like :-) Fun hub!


Dale Mazurek profile image

Dale Mazurek 7 years ago from Canada Author

If I were going to write an absolutely honest hub I would have to admit how the few times she did go with me she out fished me lol.

Thanks for the comment.


fortunerep profile image

fortunerep 7 years ago from North Carolina

Hilarious!! I am sure your wife would agree that you are patient, great story.

dori


Dale Mazurek profile image

Dale Mazurek 7 years ago from Canada Author

My wife would kick my a$$ if I was claiming this to be a true story(not far from the truth. Shh don't tell anyone.) lol

Thanks for the comment

Cheers


k@ri profile image

k@ri 7 years ago from Sunny Southern California

I love this story! I may want that video to put on my "fun music" hub, because it is very fun! I love fishing, and although your wife may not, I really, really love how this story turned out! It speaks of 2 individuals living together, but still appreciating each other...and isn't that what marriage is all about? Wonderful hub! Thanks for the laugh! :D


Dale Mazurek profile image

Dale Mazurek 7 years ago from Canada Author

I'm glad you liked it. I do have the greatest wife in the world and I know that is exactly how things would happen.

Thanks for the great words.


Richard Ring profile image

Richard Ring 7 years ago from Tokyo, Japan

Hahaha, isn't that always how it works? Just when you think you can't take anymore they do something to make it all go away. I find when I am in a situation like that I usually think I'm being very mean and spiteful when taking them around on things that are taking up too much time and blowing the day but in the end they don't notice....or they chose not to notice...lol!? Women are smart like that I suppose...think the biggest problem is our male expectation to sacrifice and get going (ie. deal with weather, non-gourmet coffe and outhouses).

Cheers for the read mate.


Dale Mazurek profile image

Dale Mazurek 7 years ago from Canada Author

Perfectly said lol.

Thanks for stopping by


treading concrete profile image

treading concrete 7 years ago from Jungle of steel.

Oh man! This is great. This is what I go through trying to get my guy to go with me. Luckily he backs out every time now, so this woman can go fishing on her own!

Great story!


Dale Mazurek profile image

Dale Mazurek 7 years ago from Canada Author

Ha ha, I love it. Maybe need you to be my fishing fling lol. just fishing of course. Thanks for the comment.

Cheers


treading concrete profile image

treading concrete 7 years ago from Jungle of steel.

We're flinging fish?! Oh but I'm into catch and release.


Dale Mazurek profile image

Dale Mazurek 7 years ago from Canada Author

For the most part its all about catch and release with me as well.


wesleycox profile image

wesleycox 7 years ago from Back in Texas, at least until August 2012

This is a great story to see both sides of things. Lesson to be learned here I think is to be patient and understanding with your woman. Great hub.


Dale Mazurek profile image

Dale Mazurek 7 years ago from Canada Author

Its really a matter of it doesnt matter what you do together as long as you are together.

Thanks for stopping by


Anath profile image

Anath 7 years ago

LOL, ok, so I will not insist anymore in going fishing with my boy. I can seee myself doing exactly what you say: make up and dress up, too cold, wanting a pee...

Somethings are better left alone :)


Dale Mazurek profile image

Dale Mazurek 7 years ago from Canada Author

Ah its all in fun and Im sure boy loves having you there


pageantgirl31413 profile image

pageantgirl31413 7 years ago from England

Awesome hub! I personally love fishing. If my husband and I were to go, it would probably be the opposite of your story. It would be me ready to go and my husband taking two hours to get out of bed and another hour and a half to get ready. (It seriously takes him and hour and a half to get ready, for me, well, 30 minutes if I do my makeup and hair, 10 minutes on a normal basis.) Keep up the good writing.


Dale Mazurek profile image

Dale Mazurek 7 years ago from Canada Author

I actually know a few girls like yourself that get to the truck way before hubbie or boyfriend. Of course this was mostly a spoof but has generated a lot of hits.

Thanks for stopping by.


Max Sumer profile image

Max Sumer 6 years ago

I just joined the Hub and posted my first Hub which related to this article in quite the opposite way. Anyhow I came across your hub and your title is hilarious, so of course I had to read it.

This is hub quite funny and although you say it's purely fiction, I detect a note of truth throughout. In fact, I think I've been through this before when taking some friends of mine fishing!

You've got a great sense of humor. I'm looking forward to reading your other posts.


Dale Mazurek profile image

Dale Mazurek 6 years ago from Canada Author

Thanks for the great comment. Truth is my wife hates fishing and in 21 years has only gone about 2 times with me.

The thing is she is a great women and fishing has actually been a thing my boys and I love doing.


earnestshub profile image

earnestshub 6 years ago from Melbourne Australia

Skillful casting and writing. I loved this hub!


Dale Mazurek profile image

Dale Mazurek 6 years ago from Canada Author

Thanks earnest, was actually one of my favorites to write.


carolina muscle profile image

carolina muscle 6 years ago from Charlotte, North Carolina

Haha.. been there, done that, but your version is a lot more fun to read than mine woulda been !!!

Cheers!

Chris


Dale Mazurek profile image

Dale Mazurek 6 years ago from Canada Author

Hey Carolina, this by far was my most fun to write.

Cheers, and thanks for stopping by

Dale


MarleneWheeler profile image

MarleneWheeler 5 years ago

Great story. My fiance and I go fishing very early in the mornings, he likes to see the mist on the water. It's hard getting up that early but it's worth it. We always have a great time catching fish.

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