Give Me One Writing Rule I Am Missing
I'm pretty confident that those two rock painting hubs will attract more traffic than all of yours over any given period. And, whether you think they are 'thoughtful' or not... well I don't give a flying rock. I like how much money they put into my Paypal account
"He smirked, “I am enjoying myself, I love the scenery.” She rolled her eyes, “Oh I get it, you think coming here impresses me?"
Love your style; very Mills & Boon
You are very welcome, my dear
Yes, it's been a long time.
I'm assuming you want real information about your writing, rather than someone who is soft soaping.
1. Your writing is stilted. By that I mean that there is no natural flow. That is unusual for someone who reads a lot because generally reading gives one an ear for the natural rhythm of language.. You appear not to have an ear for how language sounds. Because going through your entire article would be too time consuming, I'm going to use your OP (original post) to give examples
2. In your op, you said " and deleting whole portions of sentences." The word would be 'entire' not 'whole.' The thing is that it's not that the words mean anything different so much as the sound of one is better to the human ear while the other is not. So this is why the editor is substituting different words.
3. Your sentences are jerky and your writing terse. This is because you do not link sentences in a way that makes each following sentence join to the previous one in a smooth way. So, for instance, in your OP, the first paragraph, you start every single sentence with 'I' except one, and in that one, the second word was 'I.' You should start each sentence with a different word, plus you need to link sentences using conjunctives, preferably a different one each time. Do not use 'and' overmuch.
4. You need to practice 'tight' writing. This means you should say more using fewer words. I am going to rewrite your sentence and tighten it from 74 words to 43 words.
5. In order to get better rhythm, write a short sentence, then a long sentence, then a medium length sentence. This removes the terseness from your writing.
I hope that you understand the principles of good writing a little better now. If you need more help, feel free to ask.
Congratulations!
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