I'd like feedback on my article: How Going Vegan May Affect Your Body and Mind

  1. samplante profile image60
    samplanteposted 5 years ago

    Hi Hubbers,

    I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my article? What can I do to improve? Thanks!
    Here is my article: How Going Vegan May Affect Your Body and Mind

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  2. AliciaC profile image93
    AliciaCposted 5 years ago

    Hi. I see several problems in your article. As soon as the reader reads the first subtitle, they see a grammar error. This isn’t a good way to start the article. There are a few language errors a little later in the article, so you should proofread what you have written carefully.

    The link under the photo and the section starting with bold print indicates that your article is designed to support your business and product. This isn’t allowed on HubPages. You should remove all references to the product from your article.

    You need to go into far more detail about vitamin B12 in algae and mushrooms. It’s misleading to imply that a person can eat any type of algae or mushroom and get a sufficient quantity of vitamin B12 in a form that is identical to that found in food from animals. Your article is a bit short and will be even shorter once you’ve deleted the promotional aspects, so you could provide more details about the vitamin B12 situation. The article should be at least 1,000 words long.

    In addition, in the section where you say that someone may feel tired when starting a vegan diet, I don’t think you should use the other word for “tired”. It’s repetitious and might be misunderstood.

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  3. Kenna McHugh profile image84
    Kenna McHughposted 5 years ago

    I add that your bio is not a bio. It's best to write in third person. With that, I highly recommend you study HP Guidelines.

    replyreport
 
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