I'd like feedback on my article: Deep inside our heads! An excavation into...

  1. jalvathi profile image59
    jalvathiposted 5 years ago

    Hi Hubbers,

    I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my article? What can I do to improve? Thanks!
    Here is my article: Deep inside our heads! An excavation into Human brains! (must be signed in to view)

  2. AliciaC profile image93
    AliciaCposted 5 years ago

    Hi. The article is too short at the moment. You should increase the length to around 1,000 words. At the moment, the article is based on your thoughts, so it reads like a blog post. HubPages isn’t a blogging site. There are lots of amazing facts about the structure or function of the brain that you could add to the article in appropriate places. This would enable you to keep the theme of the article but add more value to it. You would need to add references to support the facts, however.

    I like your theme of how wonderful the brain is, but I think you should be careful when making the statement that being happy is one’s own choice and implying that we can choose to live the way we like. That may be true for many people. Some people in the world are in horrible situations in which positive thinking isn’t enough to completely change their situation or their attitude, however. Perhaps you could think of a way to reword the paragraph about happiness to allow for this possibility.

    Adding a relevant photo with a suitable source and license might be helpful. Once you’ve finished editing the article, you should consider whether “Health” is the best category for it. You should also think of a new title that doesn’t contain exclamation marks and matches what you have described.

    Good luck.

    1. jalvathi profile image59
      jalvathiposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks a lot Linda. Yes, now I get a perspective about the improvement areas in my article. I will follow your suggestions.

      Thanks again for helping me write better. smile

 
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