So what did I do wrong here?

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  1. Jeff Berndt profile image90
    Jeff Berndtposted 8 years ago

    So I wrote this hub right around when I first joined Hub Pages, and nobody has looked at it for some time.

    I admit that it's not an especially long hub--actually, it's rather short--but I don't feel that I can expand it without padding it, which I don't want to do.

    What might I do to get traffic flowing and keep it going?

    Thanks for all feedback,

    Jeff

    1. justplainmad profile image50
      justplainmadposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Deleted

      1. climberjames profile image54
        climberjamesposted 8 years agoin reply to this

        Ha ha!

        Try linking to it from more popular hubs.

      2. Aficionada profile image86
        Aficionadaposted 8 years agoin reply to this

        This forum section (Extreme Hub Makeover) is the place where this is encouraged.  Jeff's asking for specific help with a specific hub, not promoting it.  You're new here.  You'll learn.  I hope.

    2. CASE1WORKER profile image65
      CASE1WORKERposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      no offence but well its not glamourous is it- we all know tap water is cheaper but it does not come  in those nice little bottles which make you feel special. The actual hub itself needs a tad more imagery- i must admit to being bored by the first 50 words as I knew what you were going to say but didnt want to know it ( womens logic there)

  2. Raven King profile image59
    Raven Kingposted 8 years ago

    Dude, I left you a huge comment on your hub. There is a lot more you could to it because the issue keeps evolving. Read my comment in your hub.

  3. Aficionada profile image86
    Aficionadaposted 8 years ago

    I didn't read the comments on the Hub, so this may have been covered there.

    The article title itself doesn't indicate clearly whether you are talking about financial or environmental costs, and so some people may come to read it thinking that it will be about one thing and then find out that it's about something else.  The first paragraph does clarify, but IMO it could still be stated more clearly.  And you might even want to give a nod to the environmental impact towards the end of the Hub.

    For me, the biggest improvement would be to put the numbers into a chart or some other type of summary form - not instead of, but in addition to, what you have written.  Business types may be able to scan and glean what they need very quickly; for someone like me, reading the figures in the midst of the words makes it harder to grasp the actual message and the comparison/contrast you are aiming to provide.

    I don't think you actually need more information (that's after my quick read of the article), but maybe just add on another, different way of organizing it.

    Last item - I think the earth image looks too pixillated.  Could you use a different picture or change this one to a different size?

  4. Aficionada profile image86
    Aficionadaposted 8 years ago

    Also, have you done the linking that has been recommended? - links to some of your other articles can help, but you might also see if other Hubbers who have written about similar topics would be willing to link to this.

    PS - In the first paragraph - you probably should correct the little typo of caries to carries. (Caries means tooth decay.)

    1. Jeff Berndt profile image90
      Jeff Berndtposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Ack! THANK YOU!!! I can't believe I did that! :facepalm:

  5. relache profile image86
    relacheposted 8 years ago

    You need to flesh out the Hub.  Two paragraphs and an over-enlarged image doesn't make for a very strong draw.  Take a look at Hubs that are getting a lot of traffic (the "hot" designation) and see how varied and rich they are in the variety of content they offer.

  6. Jeff Berndt profile image90
    Jeff Berndtposted 8 years ago

    Thanks for the feedback, all. I'll take the comments to heart and see what I can do to improve this hub.

  7. SteveoMc profile image72
    SteveoMcposted 8 years ago

    Nice hub and you have good suggestions.   Just putting the hub here is going to generate some more interest.  I always gain a little bit by coming here.

  8. Jeff Berndt profile image90
    Jeff Berndtposted 8 years ago

    I've republished the hub, after having implemented many of the suggestions here. Thank you all for your constructive feedback, it's most appreciated.

    Here's what it looks like now, thanks to your advice:
    http://hubpages.com/hub/The-True-Cost-of-Bottled-Water

    1. Mark Knowles profile image60
      Mark Knowlesposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      Good luck. I have found it extremely difficult to drive traffic to any hubs that suggest anti-consumerism. Extremely difficult. I have tried them long, short, in-between, funny, serious - spending money buying links - everything. Almost zero traffic. My latest attempt - I have written a consumer-driven article with an anti-consumer rant attached -

      http://hubpages.com/hub/espresso-machines

      Lucky to get 30 views a day. sad

  9. Dame Scribe profile image61
    Dame Scribeposted 8 years ago

    Welcome to HubPages, Jeff Berndt smile I would also add environment, waste impact, etc., to your tags. Very well done and looks fantastic. big_smile O..nice pic too, btw, lol

  10. earnestshub profile image88
    earnestshubposted 8 years ago

    Good work Jeff, it looks fine now, I did not see it before. smile

  11. Aficionada profile image86
    Aficionadaposted 8 years ago

    Jeff, I really like the changes you have made.  I love the earth pic, and I really, really like the graphs.  Thank you!

    I'm not sure where you are currently publicizing this, but it is clearly geared towards business owners/managers.  If you can find a forum on a small business site, I would think that would be a great place for you to post a link to it (or on a Going Green site - preferably both).

    I think you could also make a whole series of Hubs about tactics for helping a business save money (and going green at the same time).  On the other hand, you could write a Hub that examines the opposite point of view from this one (reasons for preferring to use bottled water), but linking back to this one.  I know that idea sounds weird.  I got it from an article series I saw on another site similar to HP, where the same author wrote articles taking totally opposite viewpoints about a hot topic.  It was quite effective.  But I also realize that's not your goal here.

    1. psycheskinner profile image83
      psycheskinnerposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      However the figres used are way over what businesses are charge for bottled water in bulk.  And it leaves out intermediate option like big bottle cooler.

  12. Jane@CM profile image60
    Jane@CMposted 8 years ago

    Jeff, it is a good article.  I read it when you first posted this, but didn't get back to comment.  Truth be told, it isn't the type of hub I'd look for, but that is just me smile

 
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