Tracheostomy (Semi Medical) Hub

Jump to Last Post 1-4 of 4 discussions (12 posts)
  1. WryLilt profile image89
    WryLiltposted 7 years ago

    http://hubpages.com/t/18ab2c

    Just looking for feedback on anything I should change about this hub. Not quite happy with it for some reason. Do you think it's too personal? Not personal enough? Should include more information in some part?

    Trying to help people who have a tracheostomy and are as confused and new to it as myself and my family were.

    Thank you for any feedback.

    1. Kangaroo_Jase profile image81
      Kangaroo_Jaseposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Hey Wrylilt,

      Really hard to say or suggest any changes for you at this time. Already 'knowing' what one of these medical items were as I had a father who was, lets say a 'regular' at the hospital, and would routinely have a tracheostomy.

      I am not sure, maybe a caution before advising viewers to read further, some may find the information disturbing. Guess you will know once feedback starts to come.

      1. WryLilt profile image89
        WryLiltposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        Thanks, will see how I go. I already have a warning on my bipolar hub but had thought this one wasn't too graphic. Although from what I've experienced I have a much higher graphic content level than some!

        1. Kangaroo_Jase profile image81
          Kangaroo_Jaseposted 7 years agoin reply to this

          I do as well, can handle a fair bit of graphic, but Google, Ad sense, et al, entirely different story, as you well know.

          I write, not many, but a few articles that would consistently be deemed very graphic, but not on HP and not in any connection to any sites I have generating revenue.

  2. EmpressFelicity profile image71
    EmpressFelicityposted 7 years ago

    I thought this was a really informative and well-written hub.

    I wonder if instead of jumping in at the deep end, so to speak, it might be better to move the first paragraph of your last section (the one that begins "I had a tracheostomy due to severe throat trauma at two and a half years of age" and ends with "enlarge the hole as I grew.") so that it becomes your introduction.  Then change the first "the tube" in that paragraph to "a tracheostomy tube".

    The advantage of doing this (IMO) is that it acts as more of a hook for your reader, because it instantly makes it plain that you're talking from personal experience. 

    Then change the title of the last section from "My experience with tracheostomy" to something like "Where am I now?"

    Only other things I would watch out for are to make sure that "breathe" has an "e" on the end when it's used as a verb.

    1. WryLilt profile image89
      WryLiltposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you for the constructive feedback! Have implemented your ideas. smile

      1. EmpressFelicity profile image71
        EmpressFelicityposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        you're welcome

  3. lrohner profile image80
    lrohnerposted 7 years ago

    Wow, Wrylilt. Just wow... I admire you even more now than I did 5 minutes ago. You have been through a LOT.

    Jumping in here, I agree with EF about moving the first paragraph, but you still need a good lede--just one sentence--that gets people hooked, and that sentence should be something personal.

    It also ends kind of abruptly. Perhaps some advice from personal experience to people who might be going through this? Link to some resources?

    1. WryLilt profile image89
      WryLiltposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Ok thank you for the feedback. Have added both some advice and some resources! smile

      ...And it doesn't seem like a lot unless you think about it all in one go. smile

      1. sofs profile image80
        sofsposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        You have been very clinical and laid the facts bare, I was wondering if You could have added a little more on handling  the emotional trauma involved with the procedure.
        Having worked in the Neuro center for a while I have noticed that parents and children are extremely fearful of such procedures. Fear of  Infections, loss of voice are all constantly facing them.
        How  you coped with the extra attention, or inability to play like other children and the loss of childhood may serve as a base of knowledge for people facing similar situations.
        I think it is well written and would be helpful to people in similar situations.
        I am not an experienced  , but thought that this may add value to what you have written.

        1. WryLilt profile image89
          WryLiltposted 7 years agoin reply to this

          Thanks for the feedback Sofs, but unfortunately I can't. I was very young at the time I got the tracheostomy and following that, it was only a small part of the major issues in my life so I honestly can't think of anything to say from a personal handling viewpoint. sad

  4. SteveoMc profile image73
    SteveoMcposted 7 years ago

    Everything looks just fine to me.   I think it is compelling but at the same time clinical.   I wouldn't change it.

 
working

This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

Show Details
Necessary
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Features
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Marketing
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Statistics
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)