Please, suggestions on this hub!

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  1. prettydarkhorse profile image57
    prettydarkhorseposted 12 years ago

    Hi, This is my first month to write amazon targeted hubs (as part of the 60dc) and my first time to ask suggestions.
    Any suggestion is greatly appreciated, Thank you for your time!
    this is the latest hub of at least 29 hubs of amazon targeted baby products hubs of mine.
    Please feel free to check the other hubs if you have time to spare. (is this too much?)

    Again thank you. … ers-Online

    1. lakeerieartists profile image63
      lakeerieartistsposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Going to add my two cents to the mix.  Your introduction title is just a repeat of the hub title.  I would use it to add different keyword mixes.

      I would split your first capsule into 2 text capsules to move your second adsense ad block up further.  Then I would put your Amazon capsule or one of them where your picture is.  Your picture can move down.

      You can also condense the hub some by moving the video over to the right to make it smaller.  I agree that your list of strollers is daunting, and would put some of them in Amazon capsules instead.  Remember we want people to click on those links to Amazon.

      In general it is a good hub, and I agree that mentioning any negatives and talking about them a bit like Richard said is a good idea.  Not dwell on it, but mention it.  A stroller is a big purchase for most people, so they will want to know stuff like that.  smile

  2. Cagsil profile image76
    Cagsilposted 12 years ago

    Hey PDH,

    I realize it is an Amazon formatted hub and that's where you are trying to draw your revenue from, but the only suggestion I have is to change your second capsule.

    The picture you have along side your second text capsule and the paragraph you have along the picture is good enough.

    The list of things you put under the paragraph should be in a separate text capsule, because you can still put your Amazon stuff along side it.

    This will bring up your Google Adsense ads, above your list, instead of bring further down into your hub.

    I hope that helped. smile

    1. prettydarkhorse profile image57
      prettydarkhorseposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you dear Cagsil,

  3. Cagsil profile image76
    Cagsilposted 12 years ago

    I also noticed something else.

    The 60DCers link capsules and news capsules you have down below, switch them.

    Alternate them, move the link capsule to the left and the news capsule to the right. This will allow you to eliminate the huge "white space" down the bottom.

    I know it might not mean anything, but will look more neat and tidy. smile

    1. prettydarkhorse profile image57
      prettydarkhorseposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      but there is an ad I can block on that side or can I just put the news below my own RSS feed above the comments?

      1. Cagsil profile image76
        Cagsilposted 12 years agoin reply to this

        You could put the news feed above your comments, along side your link capsule of your own hubs. I wouldn't put it by itself, even though you could if you wanted to.

        I also realize the ad is at the end of the hub, but with my first suggestion, I would think that the ad would remain regardless. You could test it out and see if the ad disappears, but I don't think it will. smile

        1. prettydarkhorse profile image57
          prettydarkhorseposted 12 years agoin reply to this

          done and the ads are still there, thanks Cags

          1. Cagsil profile image76
            Cagsilposted 12 years agoin reply to this

            You're welcome my dear friend. Glad I could help. smile big_smile

            1. prettydarkhorse profile image57
              prettydarkhorseposted 12 years agoin reply to this

              you are always helpful,,,,what can I do for you now?

  4. Anesidora profile image62
    Anesidoraposted 12 years ago

    Looks good to me PDH.

    1. prettydarkhorse profile image57
      prettydarkhorseposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      thank you Anesidora, I appreciate it.

  5. livewithrichard profile image73
    livewithrichardposted 12 years ago

    Looks good for the most part.  The title is a little windy and I don't thing your really need to stuff it so much since it's a brand name of a stroller. 

    You might also want to consider pointing out any negatives about the product this way you can counter them and overcome any doubts or reasons not to purchase.

    Sales copy is tricky but if you only give the positives people will read right through the BS and know you are just trying to make a sale.  Quality, Costs, location of manufacture, and complaints are all factors most of us use when making online purchases.

    1. prettydarkhorse profile image57
      prettydarkhorseposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      ok, thank you Sir,  that is a good advice about the windy title too, I just saw that some do this, so I thought it might help,

      about some negatives, I will add some -- I thought about this already, think you're right.

      Thanks again..

  6. lrohner profile image69
    lrohnerposted 12 years ago

    I think it's a good first attempt, so job well done!

    I have to be honest and say that if I were an average consumer that came to this page, I would back away quickly for two reasons: 1) Grammar issues; and 2) Unnatural keyword stuffing. I mean, I got it after the capsule title alone that this was about Peg Perego strollers, and am not sure I needed it mentioned another 6 or 7 times. smile

    Both of these things drive me crazy, but that's just me and my on-again, off-again OCD. smile

    As to the list of products at the end, why don't you hyperlink each one of them (with your Amazon ID) to the actual product page, or skip the list and just put the products? It looks a little intimidating as is.

    1. prettydarkhorse profile image57
      prettydarkhorseposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Hi Ms lrohner. I appreciate your response to this, and thanks a lot for your advice.  I ran a grammar and spelling check on it. As for the linking with amazon IDs I need to read about that and apply it, whew I more time now...

  7. profile image0
    kimberlyslyricsposted 12 years ago

    Although I may be the worst to add to this, as I do not do commercial hubs, I think you really strategically placed and identified with the product visually and in descriptions.  I've worked in advertising/marketing for 20+ years and when you cut thru al the wasted corporate buzz words it comes down to 2 primary objectives;  make that product above all else the focal point at all times 2)  make it enjoyable for the customer/reader to not just groan and move on.  Visuals do this, but every research comes back with humour being the number one reason they'll seek further into this product.  This can be achieved in a number of ways.

    Don't be afraid to have fun with the product, spotlighting the product.  Tons of ways!

    Great Job

    And cag's  cool job on 800 followers

    1. prettydarkhorse profile image57
      prettydarkhorseposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Hi Kim, thanks a lot for your response, and see you suggest being lighter on the side.

  8. profile image0
    DoorMattnomoreposted 12 years ago

    well, I have no idea how to do this sort of stuff, congrats to you Pretty for doing it!! So since I don't know anything about writing a sales hub, but I do know a bit about how I search for things, (I have no idea if this will help but anyway)I signed out of hubpages and deleted cookies and went to Google to pretend I wanted to buy a Peg Perego stroller, and how would I go about searching for it? (oh, by the way..Google thinks I am pregnant now.  hahahaha) Well, Peg Perego came up as soon as I wrote "peg" and hit the space bar. So, its being searched. BUT it was pages and pages of reviews and and So I messed around some, pretended I wouldn't hit the first thing that popped up, to see what I needed to search to find your hub. If you type this.... "buy peg perego baby strollers online" your hub is the sixth site on the first page of results!!!  I think that is pretty awesome. I am guessing if you made your title a teeny bit shorter, it might be better. Im not sure tho Ive never written anything but bloggy stuff......just figured I'd let you know from a searchers point of view.  smile

  9. LeanMan profile image83
    LeanManposted 12 years ago

    Hi PDH, in addition to others comments there are a few other on page SEO related things I would add...
    I assume that a related title for each amazon capsule would help with informing google what traffic to send.
    You hub description you have on auto-generate, it does not quite mention all of the keywords in your title as it just repeats the first couple of lines of your first capsule, rewrite it to reflect all of the words in your title if these are the keywords that you are aiming for.


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