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My first poem

  1. sasanqua profile image85
    sasanquaposted 5 years ago

    Soooo I've just published poetry to hubpages for the first time. I'd love some feedback! Let me know what you think:

    http://sasanqua.hubpages.com/hub/The-Grassy-Knoll

    Thanks heaps smile

    1. imkd profile image59
      imkdposted 5 years ago in reply to this

      nice poem love this poem. love forever smile

  2. Freud-Wise profile image60
    Freud-Wiseposted 5 years ago

    If I shall be honest- Let me think:OK, fine poem, but will you consider remaking this like "Radiated to every cell in my body"?

    Make it like 'overflowed my spirit'. That fits with the rest of the poem.

    Best of luck.

    Sweet poem. smile

    1. sasanqua profile image85
      sasanquaposted 5 years ago in reply to this

      Thanks smile

    2. Paraglider profile image88
      Paragliderposted 5 years ago

      Hi - I won't critique your poem, but this forum is for critique of a hub "as a hub". Single poems presented as hubs hardly ever attract views except possibly from your followers on hubpages in the first week or so after publishing. After that, the views tend to drop to one or two a week, max. That's because there's nothing for a search engine to latch onto. The engine sees a poem as a very short piece of prose (i.e. it doesn't care that it's a poem). Single poem pages can attract viewers, but only if the poet is already famous.
      A collection of a few poems with a paragraph or two of introduction has more chance of getting noticed. Maybe try that?

      1. profile image0
        SirDentposted 5 years ago in reply to this

        This is very good advice.  One of my top 5 hubs is a collection of a few poems that I used to have published on their own but got no traffic.  5 poems with a little less than 1000 words total.  The hub gets almost 100 views each day.

    3. sasanqua profile image85
      sasanquaposted 5 years ago

      Ok great thank you, that was just the response I was looking for! Will work on another hub.

     
    working