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A child who lies has made an error in judgement. Observe your child calmly in order to determine the reason. ( Parents usually know when their child is lying. Parents are never as easy to deceive as the child believes.) Once you discover the lie the parent can deal with it as a teaching moment. Montessori explains, "What matters is not so much correction in itself as that each individual should become aware of his own errors, each should have a means of checking, so that he can tell if he is right or not."1 So we can help the child recognize his own mistakes; we all make mistakes, even parents. Montessori believed that children should know the ten commandments. It is a simple matter to remind him of them. Boundaries need to be established and continually reinforced through reminders and explanations.
1 Montessori, Maria Absorbent Mind. New York: Henry Holt and Company
How can you tell if your child is telling a lie? Sometimes parents just know by instinct, but here are some signs to look for if you are not 100% sure. Video included. read more
I pay attention to what my son tells me and I watch what he does physically when he is telling a lie. Other readers are right instinctively about being able to tell when a child is lying without even thinking about it. My son fidgets with his fingers when he is not being honest with me or my wife, his eyes get big and he tends to not blink at all while he is telling the lie. Sometimes we just let him keeep talking, the more a person talks the harder it is to keep a lie straight. This comes in handy with older children and adults who consistently lie to others.
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