Which would YOU rather be:(a) the only child or (b) the oldest child? Why?

1. 85

   gmwilliamsposted 8 years ago

   Which would YOU rather be:(a) the only child or (b) the oldest child?  Why?
   
   There is one birth order in which a child can develop to his/her utmost potential, being free to what h/she wants to be & your parents always consider you while in  the other  birth order, a child is put into rigid roles which h/she has to abide by w/little or no avenue for error, h/she is oftentimes discarded or put last, h/she has LITTLE or NO normative childhood, cannot fully be what h/she wants& your parents seldom consider you at all.  Given the aforementioned case scenario, what birth order would YOU rather be!
   
   

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2. 93

   MsDoraposted 8 years ago

   I'm an only child, and for me the cons of this situation outweigh the pros.  I'd be older since it means having siblings.  It is possible to overcome any childhood trauma and develop into the best one can possibly be.

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   1. 85

      gmwilliamsposted 8 years agoin reply to this

      YOU definitely DON'T want to be the oldest.  No one in his/her right mind does. Oldest children have no childhood.They must assume adult responsibilities in childhood.They have NO individual life, NO privacy, must be ON 24/7/365 a/k/a Cinderella!

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3. 85

   gmwilliamsposted 8 years ago

   
   
   I would rather be the only child.  Only children are never dethroned, displaced, discarded, nor dismissed by parents in favor of younger siblings.  They are THE FREEST of all birth orders.  They can develop into the best possible people.  They are free to be their individual selves.  They are never locked into rigid birth order roles.  They are accepted & loved unconditionally by their parents. They have individual time & privacy.   They have & are given myriad opportunities to succeed through educational, intellectual, & cultural activities.  They have the best possible  & imaginable childhoods.  Only children have THE VERY BEST of all worlds.  Yes, I am an only child & would not trade it for the world!
   
   Oldest children are dethroned, displaced, discarded, & dismissed by parents in favor of younger siblings.  They are held to VERY DIFFERENT standards than their younger siblings.  They are held to very strict standards of behavior.  They are blamed for, even punished for things that younger siblings do.  They are expected to be & act as adults by their parents.  They are never viewed as nor treated as children.  They must be ON 24/7/365 for their parents & siblings.  They are oftentimes parentified children who must assume parenting duties for younger siblings. 
   
   Oldest children have NO individual time & privacy.  Others are ALWAYS FIRST while they are ALWAYS LAST.  Oldest children have to carry others in the family so parents & siblings ALWAYS depend upon them to carry the familial show so to speak. There is NO such thing as normative childhoods & adolescence for oldest children.  It seems that they have to assume adult responsibilities very early in life.  They are oftentimes treated the most disparagingly by their parents.  They are overutilized & always taken for granted by their parents & siblings.  Cinderella is the apt prototype for oldest children!  No one wants to be the oldest child & for good reason.  My mother was the oldest child & HATED IT!  So did others I have encountered who were oldest children in their families.  They had NOTHING GOOD to say.  They remarked how their parents never paid attention to them & how they had to GIVE UP their childhoods.  Being the oldest child is analogous to being in .....HELL!

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4. 58

   bluesradioposted 8 years ago

   I was the only child for 7 years and then my brother was born.    I think I enjoyed being the only, however it does get lonely so I will take oldest.  Sometimes able to pass down wisdom and in my case that was also to cousins as I am also the oldest cousin......

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