Oldest Child- Discussion Board

1. 83

   gmwilliamsposted 6 years ago

   
   Are oldest children the worst treated of all birth orders?  Why?  Why not?

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   1. 88

      theraggededgeposted 6 years agoin reply to this

      No. Because my mother loves me to bits. And I her. She never treated me badly. As I never treated my oldest child badly.
      
      Your tendency to generalise every family with multiple siblings is odd. Are you obsessed with this topic by any chance?

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      1. 83

         gmwilliamsposted 6 years agoin reply to this

         No, but studies show that oldest children are oftentimes treated the worst by parents.  They are hugged less, they are punished more & harshly for offenses that younger siblings get away with, & they are given more responsibilities at earlier ages in comparison to their younger siblings who have longer childhoods. Oldest children aren't considered children at all but adults & are treated accordingly.  Also, oldest children are oftentimes cast aside in favor of younger children in the family.

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2. 72

   mrpopoposted 6 years ago

   Yes, for all the reasons you mentioned.
   
   Of course, there is a trade-off - the added challenges can result in a child that's smarter and more independent than their siblings.
   
   Out of curiousity, what made you have such great interest in this topic?

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   1. 83

      gmwilliamsposted 6 years agoin reply to this

      My mother was the oldest child.  I also had acquaintances who were oldest children.  I wouldn't wish being the oldest child on my worst enemy!

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3. 77

   Bills Placeposted 6 years ago

   Although it likely varies between families, I can see how some can see being the oldest sibling as being treated 'the worst', especially with today's mindset. As parents have more children, the newborns obviously require more attention, by the time they are more self-sustaining a routine/pattern has been developed, which can leave the oldest sibling feeling 'left out'.
   
   Although, this also depends on the mindset of the oldest sibling. Some understand the above situation, others feel they are being forgotten. I'm the youngest child, but this is my observation.

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   1. 83

      gmwilliamsposted 6 years agoin reply to this

      Oldest children are treated the worst, especially in large/very large families.  The status of oldest children in larger families are synonymous with slaves.  Oldest children in those families are persona non gratae unless in the service of parents & younger siblings.  Oldest children in larger families are taught that they don't mean anything in & of themselves- they only mean something in regards to parents & younger siblings.  Oldest children in large/very large families aren't thought of as individuals in their own right.  They are inculcated to put themselves & their needs.......LAST.
      
      Oldest children in small families(2-3 children) are treated more like individuals.  They have normative childhoods.  In small families, oldest children's needs & individuality are recognized & encouraged by their parents.

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