Cultural Error: "Don't ask your friends to help you move"

Jump to Last Post 1-3 of 3 discussions (11 posts)
  1. Jessie L Watson profile image95
    Jessie L Watsonposted 7 months ago

    Are friends becoming more of a commodity or a symbol of status in the advent of social media? What does the word "friend" actually mean these days?

    It can be partially summed up with the disturbingly common attitude that it's "rude" to ask your friends to help you move. Statements like that have always confounded me. Especially when I think about how I drop what I'm doing and help my closest friends with anything they need. Occasional acts of selflessness are what makes strong and healthy relationships.

    The sails of this sort of nonsense have a habit of catching wind in a culture that believes that people are simply a ticker of popularity or a means to an end.

    Time to start breaking these stupid rules.

    Get some most likely needed exercise.

    Be happy about aiding in the development and success of people you purport to care about.

    1. Live to Learn profile image82
      Live to Learnposted 7 months agoin reply to this

      Friends is a misnomer for associate. Most people are simply associates, which makes almost any request presumptuous.

      1. Jessie L Watson profile image95
        Jessie L Watsonposted 7 months agoin reply to this

        Fair enough.

        Although, I might contend that spur-of-moment acts of kindness can foster new relationships.

        Having said that, I generally don't ask for help when it comes to moves (even though I always need it when I move). A simple mix-up in definitions and syntax can program an entire group of people to think differently which makes the prospect of asking really difficult before anything begins.

        Boundaries make sense and I support them. I just feel like this one is a little too stringent.

        1. Live to Learn profile image82
          Live to Learnposted 7 months agoin reply to this

          I will always help, when asked. Cheerfully. But, that doesn't make them friends nor does it make me feel comfortable asking for help. All people of good will should pitch in, when asked.

          1. Jessie L Watson profile image95
            Jessie L Watsonposted 7 months agoin reply to this

            Agreed. Thanks for the feedback.

    2. Theophanes profile image95
      Theophanesposted 7 months agoin reply to this

      I've never heard anyone say it's rude to ask for help... that being said I'm apparently the go-to person to ask even though I'm female and a man would probably would make more sense...

      Anyway, my point is so many 'friends' are useless to ask (they won't show up anyway) that it leaves us helpful people doing waaay more moving and to far lesser known people than is really necessary. We go from being helpful to just being used. So step up! If these are really friends help them and maybe someday they'll help you back! That's how it's supposed to work! Let acquaintances find closer friends to help.

      1. Jessie L Watson profile image95
        Jessie L Watsonposted 7 months agoin reply to this

        +1

  2. psycheskinner profile image86
    psycheskinnerposted 7 months ago

    I've never heard anyone suggest it is rude.

    1. Jessie L Watson profile image95
      Jessie L Watsonposted 7 months agoin reply to this

      What's the rent cost where you live? lol

  3. Wesman Todd Shaw profile image96
    Wesman Todd Shawposted 7 months ago

    Every time someone asks me to help them move, there is a piano. I now have one rule for helping friends move - there must not be a piano. I will no longer be involved in moving pianos.

    One of two things seem to happen. 1. I hurt myself. 2. I get blamed for piano damage,  because said piano is too heavy for the amount of persons trying to move it to do so.

    1. Jessie L Watson profile image95
      Jessie L Watsonposted 7 months agoin reply to this

      Haha. I used to install floors for a living and there was always a piano we had to move. Always. And it was usually owned by widows in their 80s who wanted us to redecorate their living rooms while we were at it. :p

      Their kids were never around to visit or help as it were, so, its ok.

 
working

This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

Show Details
Necessary
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Features
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Marketing
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Statistics
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)