How do you heal from a relationship addiction?
In love with the idea of being in love? After a point it creates a vicious cycle! How do you get off the unhealthy pattern for good without ending all opportunity for healthy relationships in the future?
My advice, though simply stated, is a little complex. I found it best to learn to love myself and all the incredible interests I have. Then focus on knowing who I am and what I want rather than what I already had and don't want again in the future. The standing matter is to embrace who you are and acknowledge that you are okay as a single person and it gives you a chance to focus on your strengths so you can know what is best to add to your life in the future.
It is empowering to know that for each one you turn away, you become that much closer to respecting who you will be lucky enough to be with in the future. There is no perfect answer, but you must learn to say no to be able to say yes!
There is no magic answer to your question.To heal from relationship addiction, the one important thing you have to know is that there are more people who care about you,who want you to be happy.i mean your family your friends...
so don't stay alone ,go out with your friends,do things you like most in your life,share your feeling with your friend. finaly if you know how to pray do it
Thanks for the answer. I suppose there really is not easy answer. I am JUST recognizing that I have had a cycle of desperately chasing relationships with the result of them usually turning terrible. So, I am taking some time for healing and working on the loving relationships I do have: family and friends.
I realize that I started chasing fantasies as early at 7 years old. I know that I this was a result of not recieving enough love and attention at home. It is true as true that children want to be wanted. The result of missing that at home is to seek it elsewhere. What a cycle!
I spent so many years living life for others .I discovered one day that people I loved and thought they loved me back , it was all a lie.Within the last 10 years I moved from my first serious r/ship to the one I thought 'was the one' and the same I just left over 2 years ago and you know what? For the first time in my life I am living my life for myself and I have never felt so happy in my life.
I am without doubt, sure if you focus on your inner being and making yourself happy you will feel better and I think you can still have a perfectly healthy r/ship in future though I don't think I would want that for myself :-)
I have found that you must make use of as many resources as possible. Books like Codependency No More by Melody Beattie, the Dance of Anger by Harriet Lerner, Facing Love Addiction by Pia Melody, The Homecoming by John Bradshaw, online resources from Melanie Tonia Evans Narcissistic Abuse Recovery and Empowered Love, and Guided Imagery resources from Patti and Chuck Leviton can all aid in recovery from relationship addiction. Some say it is easier to recover from a heroin addiction than from relationship addiction. Most of all, if you believe in God, know that He does not want His children to be addicted to anything. I personally believe that although the Christian Church has failed miserably in dealing with the issue of relationship abuse, God has led me to the secular resources that have helped me, and showed me how to apply these principles to my life in a biblical and spiritual way that does not contradict my spiritual devotion to Christ. I hope this answer helps.
Don't be so hard on yourself. Most people looking for true love, love the idea of being in love. When you meet the right person it will be different to how it's been in the past for you. We all get a bit disheartened after a few breakups or not being able to find the relationship we desire, but you can only keep moving forward an on to better things. To save from feeling like you've created an 'unhealthy pattern' take up a new hobby or interests where you can mix with new people. The gym, a Salsa class, Tennis club - Whatever suits you. This way you'll be spending some of your free time in a positive way and you'll get to mix with new people. Hope this helps, best wishes!
You have to start a new addiction with yourself. Fall into a relationship with you. Learn about yourself through being alone and try to search to love yourself. This is very hard to do but extremely rewarding if you can. Many believe that another person (lover) have the key to your happiness, this couldnt be further from the truth. And instead (this time) of getting into another relationship to learn of relationships through anothers guide, you fall for yourself, learn of the beauties within your own mind and soul. For only after you have truely begin to respect, honor, and love yourself, will you be any good for someone else. Seriously. I'd say its time to get busy.
spend a great deal of time being single, it sucks!! but in the end you will feel better about your self and give a better relationship to somebody that deserves it, i was a serial dater but now i have been relationship free for a year my self worth has gone up about a million points.
There is no easy way out, some people fall into a serious depression where it will take time to get past that phase of healing first. Having friends and family members help tremendously, also having a strong spiritual belief system works wonders. What worked for me was laughing, sounds simple but this was my therapy. I would watch my favorite shows that made me laugh and I was able to move on after. I have a strong spuritual background so coaching myself everyday was part of the therapy. Most important when you are able to move on let your relationships come to you, do not make it your buisness to seek out relationships, find love within yourself always remember no one can make you happy if you can't be happy with yourself. When you seek out reationships you tend to jump in to situations, mingle do not settle.
I simply go away far from where I could see
that face beautiful face that once made me smile
and has hurt me as though she never once looked
me in the eye and said I love you.
I just go away..
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