My Kid Blocked The Darn Facebook On Me!
Nowadays, our kids have a world of their own, and we don't blame them. They have dealt with the changing times, added to bullying, divorced and harassment of all type--55% married couples won't last those 15 years or more. Your Vinyl records or cassettes from 'Sony and Cher' will remind them that you are already an outcast for them. Or perhaps they were denied that brand new car that they saw on the reality show,"My sweet sixteen." They even created a new language that would keep you away from their own circle. LMAO! So you are in trouble, hearing from New iPads to the coolest apps, that sadly you don't even know what they are for...!
FROM MESSENGER TO FACEBOOK
Back in the middle 90's Hotmail, AOL, and even AIM, were the fad. Kids would open accounts left and right using mostly a name and the numbers of their birthday. Some shyer would choose the puppy's name and some odd number, in order confront availability. But, since Mark Zuckerberg made fun of this 'girl' and exposed her on his new TheFacebook, Kids took the banner on their own, and unfortunately wherever Kasey went, Shannon did. Then the trend took off, and everybody started to open accounts. Didn't matter if they were 11 years old. They would beat the system and with no problem would certainly open or logged in in 10 minutes. "If my older sister has one, why not me??" Said 12 years old Ricky.
But, lately they have created their own circles, and even realize that 'adding you' was a mistake 'contra natura .' Why? They wanted to fit in, and be capable to upload pictures that you wouldn't approve of. So the Nerdy 'kiddo' of the group...You suck!, taught them how to block your account...and war was inmediatly declared. So, a friend of mine asked me how can she battle against it, and probably save them from a potential psycho, pedophile or a relationship that you didn't approve from the beginning?
TIPS FOR YOU, THE PARENT
- Your kid blocked you. Now you know that you have been flagged.
- Open a Hotmail account with a catchy name, depending on your kid. Dachick96, Nerd4u94, youzuck69. You name it! Just think of an appealing nick, cool and innofensive.
- If you don't come up with some, check your kid's list on her/his hotmail account.
- With that messenger as a tool follow up by opening a Facebook account too.
- Ask your kid to add you as a friend....
- Upload a picture from Google or Bing, for your profile. The more pics you find, the better
- check interested in music that your kid listens to, for the heck of it. No Bieber or Disney songs please! Hanna Montana worst! Barney? Are you crazy?...no teletubes either!
- Your kid is smart enough to open 2 more accounts, so when accepted, check her/his list offriends. Some of them are his. The other accounts are for back up, or for the forbidden better half.
- Start checking for the accounts that are similar to your kids and add them as friends too.
- Go to Youtube and share a song that your kid usually listens to: "share"
- On your profile add the words: Lonely bitch or freaking Kwel nerd...you got me?
- Start using the Facebook messenger and start chatting. They will notice your language right away, so use excuses like your dad left you, or you want to be an English teacher.
- Catch up with them and download the stupid Facebook app to your Cell phone. This way, you will check on them from your office.
- Start being nosey and ask the questions you want to know. Just drop the question that... as a parent you know to ask. Learn to say, zup! Yo! Word! F##tard.
- If you cannot do all these: ask that 16 yeard nerd to help you and ask him to 'friend' your kid. Tell this God sent kid, that you as a parent are worried.
- I f this doesn't work either, have a talk wih your kid. Drive by a near park, after that movie... subtly ask them why they blocked you from their account. They will deny every thing for sure, uploading 240 pictures from all those trips and the ones she/he took behind the bathroom door cannot be deleted...just because you begged them to open up!
- If they don't care, go to Number 1 and become your own Sherlock Holmes! Most learned to lie unfortunately!!