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Silence Defies The Heart

Updated on February 21, 2013

Some are bound to be alone.

Seizan - Seated Horse -
Seizan - Seated Horse - | Source
Little Mother by Hyde -
Little Mother by Hyde - | Source

Not everyone gets to choose.

'Silence Defies the Heart.' An awesome poem of life and hope by Pearldiver, about what it means to be an absentee, unable for whatever reason, to share one's time and life with one's children or family. It is about the emotions that remain long after the initial separation is made between a parent and a child, the pain, the hope, soul searching, the realization and most significantly; the emptiness of hollow silence.

Not everyone has the opportunity to live and grow within a functioning family unit and there are a wide variety reasons for that situation. Throughout history, wars have taken the lives of many parents and always heavily affected the lives of those left to adjust and cope with the loss, emotional costs of separation and the need to keep moving forward. In such circumstances however, in many ways there are balances that are brought about by the finality of the death of that parent and thus allows moving forward positively, can be achieved, merely because of the deep healing power of knowing.

For many others, there is a subconscious burden of deeply set emotional inabilities effectively created by coping with growing up not knowing the absentee parent, or whether that person has ever cared, or does care about his or her child.

To have a positive balance and real level of certainty in life, allows one to develop to one’s greatest capacity and thus do so, without the negative driving force of anger, shame or blame, directed at the absentee parent. Ironically however, irrespective of the circumstances, the parties tend to overlook the fact that they carry similar genes. For the parents going it alone it is not always a selfish action on their part, even though it may perceived that way. Sometimes, distance and lack of communication, allows all the parties to find their respective ways in life.

Copyright © 2012 - 2013 Pearldiver nzpol with all rights reserved

Please... Respect the author's Copyright on this material.

From the Childs perspective:

Which of these key issues do you consider to be the largest negative factor created as a result of absentee parenting?

See results

Other factors that relate to parental absenteeism.

Sadly, when absenteeism has come about as a result of divorce or relationship breakup, often silence and the alienation of the absentee parent by the children, is really spawned from within an intentional, selfish influence forced on everyone by the remaining parent who makes the most of that negative influence over the children. This tends to be a major issue for many fathers who find that the law tends to generally support the mother and her 'parenting' needs, much to the detriment of the father's, or child's real relationship needs.

Men as a whole, do not cope well with such scenarios and perhaps that, along with the possibility of further rejection, in many respects helps support the perceptions of not caring or finding the ability to discuss their true heartfelt feelings openly. Just ask a father if he feels the same as the wrongly dictated to character Robin Williams played in the film Mrs. Doubtfire, or watch closely, as they melt down from this situation, inwardly and silently.

'Silence Defies The Heart' was written for all the purposes above. The issues referred to have not been expanded upon in this article, as the poem below is the core of this work by Pearldiver. If this poem fits the circumstances within your life, then as the author, I hope that my words will help to bring back the opportunities to communicate and talk to one another from the heart, while the hearts still beat. Please enjoy this poem of hope and life.

Copyright © 2012 - 2013 Pearldiver nzpol with all rights reserved

Sometimes it's just about the paths we take just to find our way.

- The paths we take -
- The paths we take - | Source

Factually, being silent does not always denote guilt.


Sometimes it's circumstances or other's influence silencing us.

- Barriers - Bamboo Screens -
- Barriers - Bamboo Screens - | Source

It's a lonely way we love when:

'Silence Defies The Heart.'

- ♥ -

I can’t ignore the constant sound of past rains anymore

Their waves of doubt demanding confidence to wane

So many years lost, clutching those guiding perceived fears

While a heart cries out, on all those empty days

This silence defies my heart and soul so much

It leaves them forever scarred, hopelessly restrained

This silence defies all words we needed to say

And fuels the doubt, that talking could take away

In muted words I tell you things, you’ve never heard

I’ve told you every day, how much I really care

Declared my love and always missed, your energy

Can you forgive, not blame, nor be ashamed, by this silent plea?

Or find the truth within, angry neutral spaces, that we share?

This silence defies every pleasure of love and life

Just frigid, barren walled defenses, repressing vocal gain

This silence defies all words we needed to say

And fuels, the fears, that knowing could take away

Though our lives are a sequence of choices

We often don’t consider their consequence at all

Sometimes we must make really hard decisions

In duress, our backs firmly pressed, against walls

When we are young, others do try to influence us

Turn us against those whom we would love, differently

This silence defies every parent’s hope for their child

Yet can’t justify lost trust, or the flicker, in a dying flame

This silence just defies all words we needed to say

And fuels the blame, those words would take away

It’s raining and I can’t ignore, your disappointment anymore

You need to know, how proud I am of you, on any given day

And know that these are far more, than merely muted words

For loudly, great souls speak out, beyond any need to say

I’ve loved you in silence now through too many unreal fears

I never faltered in my hope it was, a silence that we both heard

Intuitively, I’ve felt the putdowns and sensed your raining tears

I wish you knew calm hearts always beat silently, on rainy days

Can you not feel me beating, within the pulse, of all your ways?

This silence defies the heart of all truth, that you’ve never heard

But you’ve had time to understand life circles, in more than words

There's a very special silence when hearts beat, so that love can pray

And in every parent’s soul, the paths they took, just to find their way

In time’s silent anticipation is hope defined, in the words we need to say!

"It's Time That We Talked! - Today!"


♥ Words by Pearldiver ♥

Copyright © 2012 - 2013 Pearldiver nzpol with all rights reserved

So many people allow their perceived fears to dictate their life.

Perceived Fears
Perceived Fears | Source

This article and original poetry is Subject to Copyright © 2012 - 2013 Pearldiver nzpol with all rights reserved. Respect This.

Pearldiver | Source

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