Stop your baby crying

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   jack10loveposted 7 years ago

   How to stop your baby crying in babysitting every morning ?

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      jack10loveposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Well Mom may be attached to the baby and this in turn will make the baby cry that is sort of bonding which no one understands.Well even my 3 yrs old son use to cry when he goes to play school. i feel like taking him back to home when he starts crying but still he has many things in life so i leave him with a hug and kiss saying a good bye. Babys language is crying they cant speak like us if they try to do so they will be adults.

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   tomsmithnowposted 7 years ago

   You could try to comfort, soothe or distract the baby. Maybe sing to the baby, gently swing the baby back and forth as you cradle the baby next to your body, take the baby for a walk in a stroller, distract the baby with a white noise such as a vacuum, give the baby a pacifier to suck on, swaddle the baby by securing the baby's body in a blanket, or hold the baby on it's side or stomach. However, babies should always be put to sleep on their backs.

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      Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      get the baby out of babysitting … give the crying baby back to its mother.

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         Aime Fposted 7 years agoin reply to this

         Gee, that's not terribly judgmental or anything.
         
         Some women have to work. You know, to support said baby. So that they're not crying from being homeless or hungry.

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            Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years agoin reply to this

            Gee… is it too much to ask that a baby have its mother?

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               Aime Fposted 7 years agoin reply to this

               The baby does have its mother the other ~16 hours a day.
               
               Not everyone can survive on one income so both parents need to work. Single mothers need to work just to get that one income that may or may not even be enough. Women who have worked hard to establish careers may need to keep working so they don't have a large employment gap.
               
               Not sure what world you're living in where it's easy peasy for most mothers to stay home all the time but it's not the real one.

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                  Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                  Its not a real world for the baby without its mother. A baby needs / requires his real true and own mother exclusively and as constantly as possible. That's why he / she is crying.

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                     Aime Fposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                     That's a pretty narrow view of infancy. A mother is (usually) a baby's primary attachment, but that doesn't mean they're not capable of forming healthy, close attachments with others. In fact it's imperative that they do.

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                        Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                        no. Not even fathers can replace the mother's love and care.  Babies want, need and respond on a real level only to their own mothers. They can put up with others caring for them but they only grow and develop in the care of their mothers. They know the difference between their mother and anyone who is not. They require at the most basic and deep level ONLY their mother. At three, it is okay to let them go to daycares, but before that age, its not good for the baby's positive psychic development. At all.
                        … and this is why in Europe mothers stay home to raise their child for two years before returning back to work. Some day we will get with the program.
                        Edit: Not two years. "Lack of paid maternity leave is an issue in the developing world, but it’s also a problem in the United States. The U.S. is one of the only developed countries without a national paid maternity leave program. Compare that to countries like Sweden where new mothers and fathers are eligible for 48 weeks each of paid leave after the birth of a child, the UK (39 weeks) and Russia (28 weeks). Even India and Malaysia both offer 12 weeks of paid leave to their new mothers."
                        http://www.huffingtonpost.com/linda-mur … 70981.html

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                           Live to Learnposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                           That is completely ridiculous. What does that say of your view of adopted children? Couples who have children through a surrogate mother?
                           
                           As to the answer to the question posed by the OP. Change sitters. Unless you are 100% sure that the sitter is completely trustworthy.

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                              Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                              adopted infants need the care of a primary caregiver who will become the birth mother's replacement. They need this person for the entire first two or three or four years. Two at the very least.

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                              Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                              There is no 100 % ... EVER.

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                           jack10loveposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                           ya at 3 years it is fine to leave your baby in day care he will enjoy being with friends and toys.Thank u for ur comment

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   Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years ago

   It is not fine to just throw your baby in daycare so you can keep working. Its better to not give birth in the first place than to leave your baby in the care of strangers in daycare facilities. If you are a working woman, make a commitment to your materialistic life and let the souls in heaven remain sleeping peacefully in the arms of the angels.

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      Aime Fposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Unless of course she's taking precautions and her birth control fails in which case she should be forced to give up her lifestyle and drop everything to raise a baby. Right?
      
      And it's not just about being "materialistic" in most cases, it's literally about being able to afford rent and food to keep herself alive so that she can care for her child.
      
      You seem to be saying on one hand that women shouldn't have children unless they're wealthy enough to be able to take three years off from work... but on the other hand saying women who want children shouldn't be focused on their careers. Hm. How did these women come along such wealth?

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         Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years agoin reply to this

         hmmm …  How about not letting the egg and the sperm get anywhere near each other!
         How hard could it be?
         ( oh, don't answer that.)

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            Aime Fposted 7 years agoin reply to this

            Right, of course.
            
            Women, don't have sex until you've saved up enough money to support a child without any income for 2-4 years. It's fine, if you're lucky you might be able to bang before you hit 35.
            
            Or if you'd rather not wait, just go ahead and marry someone making at least $70K a year. Oh, you fell in love with freelance artist without a steady income? Tough shit. No, it doesn't matter if your salary is enough. It has to be HIS! Go fall in love with someone richer!
            
            Good job, women. You snagged a rich guy so now you're allowed to have sex! Enjoy your new life. But probably shouldn't enjoy your job too much because you gotta be ready to drop that shit at a moment's notice. Sorry, sir, I cannot accept this promotion because my uterus is my real boss.
            
            Oh, oops, the condom broke? Your IUD didn't work? You just had a busy fricking day and forgot to take your pill? Sucks for you, we're gonna make you have this thing anyway. We don't care if you never actually wanted kids or if you took all the right precautions. Shouldn't have had the sex you irresponsible hoebag! At least you can afford to stay home with this baby you weren't really ready for. Hashtag blessed.
            
            What's that? You're having a hard time? That's too bad. But don't even dream of going out for coffee with your friends or getting a sitter for a date night until your kid's in school because they will be irreparably shattered if you are not there for them every second of the day.
            
            Women, you did this to yourselves by wanting to have dirty sex stuffs with men. Now you have to stop being you. No adult time. No career aspirations. You are a human pacifier. Your body exists only to feed and hold your child. Your husband, who works hard to support you and this child, is meaningless; meaningless to the baby because he's not you, and meaningless to you because he's not the baby.
            
            Isn't this great? Who wouldn't want this? Even if for some reason this doesn't sound just freaking fantastic you can go buy an assortment of dildos and have a relationship with those for the next 50+ years! They're not great conversationalists and they never dress up nice when you go out to dinner but they'll never put you in the horrifying position of having to leave your child with a babysitter THANK GOODNESS!

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               Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years agoin reply to this

               Yeah, because its all about  Y O U,  isn't it? and there are plenty of ways to have good sex with a real human, (who will dress up nicely on a date,) without letting the egg and the sperm near each other. Man, do I have to write a book? (I don't think they would let me write a hub.)

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                  Live to Learnposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                  I think your position is somewhat archaic. If we still lived in the 1940's it might be doable but the world has changed and one must change with it.

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                     Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                     Human nature is unchangeable. We need to cooperate with nature. Some Indian tribe mothers raised a child until he was six before conceiving another child. 
                     
                     In modern times, Dr. Maria Montessori scientifically backs up this innate wisdom with the discovery that the child is in a second embryonic stage of psyche-development. That is the mind. The MIND is being formed for six whole years. It is nature at work and we must respect nature.

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                        Live to Learnposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                        Nature at work. Really? If we left it up to nature many women would be having babies every 10 months. Which, strangely, goes completely against your nature at work theory.

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                           Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                           Those are the women who never developed their minds.
                           Prolly had absent mothers.

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                              Live to Learnposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                              Or, perhaps, they aren't ones regurgitating the thoughts of others.
                              
                              Don't buy, lock stock and barrel, other people's ideas and theories. Our society would be a strange and dull place if all people did all things exactly alike. What works for one person doesn't work for another. What is best for one child is worst for another.

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                  Aime Fposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                  Oh really, how? Other than the instances I already mentioned where birth control can and does fail. I personally know multiple women who have conceived while using birth control correctly.
                  
                  But even if you desperately want a child it doesn't mean you need to give up the rest of yourself for years to raise a kid. It's good for children to form attachments with people other than their mothers. It's good for a mother to have her own interests and to take some time to focus on herself.
                  
                  My mom was a single mom and her options were to either abort me, or work full-time to support me. That is the reality many women face. People make mistakes. You yourself have made many, I am certain. We all do the best we can and it's not always perfect. You don't have to be judgmental and condescending about it. A little understanding goes a long way.

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   Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years ago

   Men should take note. If they can't afford a baby/ child/ teen/ young adult don't get anyone, not even your wife, if she prefers to work, pregnant. Its a simple matter.

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   Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years ago

   ...how would you like to be the baby who needs his mother for EVERYTHING? His psyche is being built every second. Every second counts ... rapidly organizing, cataloging, responding, absorbing. The baby depends on the mother's consistent presence for the smooth and complete development of his psyche and mental stability/strength. The body is simply getting bigger, but the whole of his mind is being formed in an indelible way setting the foundation of acute awareness and intelligence for the rest of his life.
   
   His psyche or spiritual life is under constant second by second transformation and growth. He cannot be left to strangers who instill values the baby did not vote for. He voted with his feet, so to speak, by choosing Y O U !!! Only YOU will do. So, if you really want to be self-oriented do it in the direction of devotion to your child who loves you one thousand percent. Thats 1000% Do you want that child to smile at Y O U? love Y O U? … have something amazing to tell Y O U ? Or do you want to sever the bond and let him feel he is drifting in a sea of faces and wah wah wahs.
   
   There is a group photo which haunts me to this day: The experiments of Hitler: They were motherless humans conceived in test tubes and raised in a community of adults. They had the saddest, hollowest expressions on their faces.
   They had no mothers to love them or to love. They had no fathers to look up to, to learn from, to emulate, to adore and worship. They had no mothers who understood their every need, or give them vital and meaningful assistance with their turns of development and mental and physical advancements. No one to help them feel and expand the joy of life percolating within them. No. Instead their joy of life was shut down in confusion, in a feeling of floating about with no roots, or solidity or stable focus.
   
   So, have at it if you want. But you will not get the satisfaction every soul craves: Love. How do I know this? I have been around along time. I have seen it with my own eyes by observing and experiencing life around me.

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      Live to Learnposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      I disagree with much of your beliefs on this subject. When my son was young he had to go to a babysitter while I worked. I made sure he was in a happy and healthy environment. He had more loving hands to take care of him than one would with a stay at home mom. He had more environments to grow in than he would have had with a stay at home mom. As he grew he learned social skills which he would not have had the opportunity to learn with a stay at home mom. He had more varied educational experiences and was taught from many more angles than he could have had with a stay at home mom.
      
      I don't judge stay at home moms. They make their decisions as to what they think are best for their kids but I find myself rolling my eyes at ones who criticize other decisions; as if their ideas are all that matter and all that count.

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      IslandBitesposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      It shows.

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         Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years agoin reply to this

         In my day as a child, (in the 50's) children developed good imaginations. Nowadays, children don't have to develop their imaginations. They are handed all sorts of screen technologies to pacify them so as not to wake up their parents.
         
         So, we are probably in for a lot of trouble in the future in more ways than one, regarding the lack of ability to imagine.

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            Aime Fposted 7 years agoin reply to this

            You are incredibly cynical and condescending towards today's parents. We are not in the 50's anymore. That doesn't mean the 50's was the shining example of how to raise children or that we're doing it all wrong today.

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               Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years agoin reply to this

               You'll see.

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            Live to Learnposted 7 years agoin reply to this

            Wow. Did you even think about that prior to typing it? Have you ever been around a kid in the last ten to twenty years? The last thirty? Their imaginations are just fine. I realize that instead of figuring out ways to have fun with an empty milk jug they are now imagining themselves on a different planet dealing with all kinds of novel scenarios and it isn't quite the same but it is still imagination at work.

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               Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years agoin reply to this

               Children are born with the ability to imagine. I just hope too much technological influence in children's lives does not shut down their natural creativity and imagination. This current generation of parents needs to document and reveal how smart phones, iPads, PC's, laptops, TV, easy access to movies and the internet, games, etc. influences the psyches and the lives of their kiddos. My hope is that love is a fail-safe and that families can overcome whatever is overly-stimulating, (and addicting) in their environments.
               
               However, I think today's kids are even more spoiled and bombarded with artificial stimulation than the kids of the 90's were.
               
               For instance, I went with a family to a birthday party held at the local bowling alley for two children turning 5. Now, this bowling alley is modern, recently renovated, and is complete with loud pounding music / continuously playing music and sports videos on screens situated on the entire wall above all the lanes. The place is dark except for multicolored neon lights around the bowling pins. The environment was not good for concentration and focus, taking turns, and listening to adults. So, the kids ranged 2 1/2 to 7 yrs. old were running amok, not taking turns, throwing the bowing balls down the lanes willy nilly, ignoring their parents and people in charge and dashing all over the bowing alley wherever they wanted. Not even the staff stepped in to create some sort of order! I asked one of the staff if this was typical behavior for this age group. She said, "Yes."
               
               It was not fun for me. It was a scene out of Hell. The birthday girl was a total brat. A total selfish brat. Not even her mother had much influence over her.
               S P O I L E D ! ! ! 
               ( But then, this child is in daycare eight hours a day, every day of the week. To compensate for her absence, the mother indulges her on the weekends, holidays and special events such as birthdays. Yikes. )

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                  Live to Learnposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                  LOL. So a kid's birthday party was not fun for you. They aren't meant to be fun for you. I'd suggest you not attend a Chuck E Cheese party. Or any kid's party for that matter. They are usually wild with kids having a good time. For their sake. That is what a kids party is all about.
                  
                  As to the spoiled brat comment. You might just attempt to find things to do which don't involve children.

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                     Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                     That's for sure! I avoid being in this child's presence as much as possible. She used to be kind as sweet as all children naturally are, but these qualities are subsiding as she is being spoiled by her mother and grandmother, (who I know) and experiences a hard life in daycare. She is treated abysmally by the grandmother she lives with, as she will not stop swearing in the girl's presence. She contributes to the child's being spoiled on the one hand and openly criticized and complained about on the other.
                     It can only get worse as she absorbs the environments she lives in, since the first six years are indelible.
                     
                     At school, she and her classmates do not have enough liberty in the state-run pre-school / daycare program she is enrolled in and the children bully each other. How do I know what goes on in this day care? I substituted in her classroom. The children are only allowed free time outside where they are finally free to play, but there is little to do but run around or play on the play structures. Inside, they must, at three and four years old, do only planned, mostly art, activities. This is an eight hour a day program. They partake in junk food lunches, (pizzas, crackers, chicken nuggets, cookies) and are forced to nap. This child will not nap and is forced to stay on her cot doing nothing … not even reading a book, for an hour and a half every day. Those who do not get sleepy at 12:30PM are forced to stay on their cots by teachers and aides who yell at them with angry tyrannical attitudes. Since I will not act like that, I refused to sub at this school again. When I was there, I set up stations with many different activities. I had planned to give them free choice for a whole hour, but the aides told me this was not allowed.
                     
                     Kids at this age learn best in an environment where they have freedom to choose their own activities. In a Montessori school, which strives to institute the home, these activities are didactic, self-teaching, activities. The children in school daycares are not allowed to learn ANYthing on their own. In preparation for public school, they must do what the teacher dictates. The activities are the same for every child and every child must do them whether they want to or not.
                     
                     This expectation of compliancy is not age appropriate. A child in the home does what nature within him dictates. Not the mother or anyone else. Consequently, this child is learning very little. At five she cannot write her name or numbers/alphabet, or even tie her shoes, despite the fact she has been going to this school since she was three and a half. And yet to enter kindergarten she is required to write the alphabet and numbers through ten.
                     
                     The key is freedom within boundaries.
                     The bowling alley situation had no boundaries. The daycare has nothing but. (Children are naturally willing to follow the guidelines set forth by their parents and adults in charge.)
                     The answer is in blending the two: Freedom within boundaries. Boundaries for the sake of freedom.

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                  Aime Fposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                  You do this a lot. You take some experience that you've had, which seems like you've dramatized for effect, and you apply it to everyone else. That's not going to give you an accurate view of anything.
                  
                  I have a 5-year-old myself so believe me when I say I've been around a lot of kids in this age group over the past few years. There are some kids who don't listen well and are generally not well-behaved. I'm sure there were kids like that back in the 50's, too. But the majority of kids listen to their parents/teachers/coaches and are about as well-behaved as you can expect a 5-year-old to be.
                  
                  What's wrong with parents indulging their kids on special occasions such as birthdays? That does not automatically make a child spoiled. I tend to get my daughter lots of stuff for Christmas/birthdays... but she also spends a portion of her money (that she gets from chores) on new toys that she donates to other kids rather than keeping for herself, and she needs to donate some of her old toys as well to make room for new ones. You don't know how children are raised or what their overall behaviour is like based on a snippet you see at a birthday party.

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                     Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                     I'm trying to drive home a point: Freedom within boundaries, which can also apply to society.
                     The boundaries are for sake of allowing and enabling liberty. This might be rocket science for the people of the modern age who know or care little for the best way to raise a child or create a workable society.
                     
                     Have you read The Absorbent Mind written by Dr. Maria Montessori?

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                        Aime Fposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                        Sigh.  There you go again.  At least people in the modern age aren't going around hitting their kids with belts willy nilly.  I'd say that's a vast improvement...
                        
                        And no, I haven't, but I don't disagree with her ideas on how children should learn and be treated - I disagree with your judgments, generalizations, and shaming of parents/children.

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   Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years ago

   I am shooting for the ideal. Thats all. If everyone used their minds and tried to control their animal hormonal promptings we would have a much better world.

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   Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years ago

   You can have sex without letting the sperm NEAR the egg!!!! You just have to be the slightest amount creative.

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      Aime Fposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Please do tell me what infallible way this can be done. I'm sure the world would love to know.

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         Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years agoin reply to this

         Maybe I should write a hub!!!!! How does the staff respond to X rated material?
         
         I wonder if there is a market for this topic (via books, videos, being a TV and radio talk show guest,   webinars, seminars, etc.) for the express purpose of revealing sex practices/exercises/bed romping escapades that completely bypass the possibility of conception!
         Why it might become an olympic event! I could become a coach!
         My MY!
         (NOT)

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            Aime Fposted 7 years agoin reply to this

            Your lack of a genuine response leads me to believe that you don't actually have anything productive to say. The scientific community is in agreeance that no birth control method is 100% effective (aside from abstinence) so if you know of something you really need to share it with everyone. To not do so would be willfully withholding information that prevents unwanted pregnancies, so come on, let's hear it!
            
            Unless of course you're referring to things outside of sexual intercourse in which case you're still implying that people not have actual sex until they're rich enough to support an entire family on one income (specifically the man's). Which could never happen.

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               Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years agoin reply to this

               Its called, "Use your imagination." If people don't have one, this is where the problem lies.
               Maybe, I should teach courses in Imagination 101.

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                  Aime Fposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                  Again... not answering the question leads me to believe you don't actually have an answer. "Imagination" has nothing to do with the practicalities and realities of having sexual intercourse so as to not get pregnant.
                  
                  Please don't try to teach anyone anything. That would require you to actually answer questions without just throwing out vague ideas and changing the subject every time one of those ideas enters your head. I'm not sure you're capable.

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   Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years ago

   Okay …
   Parents, you are doing a great job. Keep it up. You do not need to take classes, read or learn from previous generations regarding child/human development because you are so acutely and innately intelligent without having to research or even work with pets or children before becoming parents.
   So, keep up the good work.

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      Aime Fposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      ...except we are learning from previous generations and information on childhood development is being researched constantly.  That's kind of my point. You're dismissing today's parents when we actually have more resources than ever. Learning from previous generations doesn't mean replicating them exactly. And there is no one correct way to raise children. You seem to be very stuck in the mindset that there is a single formula for how to be good parents and that no parents today know what it is, and that's just completely ridiculous.

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         Kathryn L Hillposted 7 years agoin reply to this

         Well, I am happy to be wrong and for you to be right.
         

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