How do you get on a temperamental teenagers good side.
When you feel like you are walking on egg shells every time your teenager walks into the room, how do you get on their good side ? Can a parent get on a moody teenagers good side ?
Determined Unconditional Love.
My eldest daughter although not moody had a lot of difficult stuff in her life. A stepfather, new siblings and a birth father who had major life controlling problems.
We tried always to answer each challenge with unconditional love and understanding. I found a great way to get her to talk and open up was on long drives. Later I discovered that this is a conflict management tool sitting side by side opens discussion and removes conflict. It would usually be at the end of the drive the talk would come.
I also had a good friend who loved my daughter and I would ask her to talk to Faith saying I think this is the problem. I was usually right. Faith would be much better just from talking to a safe adult who cared and wasn't her mother.
I never forced the issue or made her talk to me, now she talks to me about everything and has grown into an amazing woman.
I also demanded and gave good manners. It doesn't matter what you feel like you can still treat others properly.
My son also is aspergers and has epilepsy when he went to a Psychologist at 16. His Psychologist said he had never met a child with aspergers who didn't have anger issues before.
I believe it is that determined unconditional love that always works for the best for your child and believes that everyone has a purpose and a reason for their life. sorry this is a bit long, I think I should make a hub. hope it helps.
1) Be a friend and make sure you sincerely are treating them like one. A true friend is never patronizing and seek to be right all the time. A friend comforts the hurting; not lashing at them. Give them moral support whenever needed.
2) Be a good... read more
You have to show them that you not only love them, but that you care about what they do and what happens to them.
Silly rules are not an option. The most important thing about making a rule is showing the teenager why you have made it. Every teenage longs to be treated as an adult, and most of them may surprise you with how well they understand things.
I have to say that I grew up in a VERY strict household. I am in college now, but I was never allowed to say anything back to my mother. I was not allowed to slam doors or even date until my Senior year of high school. And now I look at all my friends and how they treat their parents or even how they treat their professors, and I'm just shocked.
So, honestly, if it's past the point of speaking with them and knowing they're not only listening, but absorbing what you say, and past the point of disciplining them and seeing it work, then the next option would be to get outside help. There are counselors who may be able to help both you and your child and relieve a lot of the stress that you feel on a daily basis.
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