Does having moments where you want to strangle your children make you a bad pare

Jump to Last Post 1-12 of 12 discussions (14 posts)
  1. peeples profile image93
    peeplesposted 11 years ago

    Does having moments where you want to strangle your children make you a bad parent?

    Never acting on it of course.

  2. blessedp profile image80
    blessedpposted 11 years ago

    Well Peeples I don't think so.  Because at times I have to threaten mine harshly, but that's when I get angry.  But I can say though, never act when you are angry because you are not thinking clearly and might do things that you might regret.  Becoming a parent I now see all that my parents went through, we were kids once so we should be able to identify with them.  Only parents with kids that are always good will never think like that.  So don't think you are a bad parent.

  3. Kenneth Ray profile image64
    Kenneth Rayposted 11 years ago

    Being a parent can be stressful. I have been frustrated with my children more times than I can count. I think admitting the frustration and talking about it is the healthy way to deal with it. Anger and frustration are emotions which stem from... read more

  4. glmclendon profile image60
    glmclendonposted 11 years ago

    I don't think it makes you a bad parent, it makes you a parent on the edge. Step back . Don't touch or speak when you are in this state of mind!

    Stay Well

  5. profile image63
    win-winresourcesposted 11 years ago

    HI Peeples-

    Any parent, including the very best, have moments of utter exasperation.  Combinations of events, stresses, in addition to or brought on by a child, and the exigencies of time or money (or otherwise) can push even the most understanding parent to the brink.

    It's how you handle it that is the key.  Putting a child (or even baby) in a safe place and walking away is perfectly reasonable.  Any form of violence is not.


  6. Ona Canady profile image61
    Ona Canadyposted 11 years ago

    Moments where you want to strangle your child doesn't make you a bad parent it makes you human. We all get frustrated with our children, I remember my father putting his hands around my neck once. He never squeezed, but he was that frustrated.

  7. pstraubie48 profile image81
    pstraubie48posted 11 years ago

    No, it makes you HUMAN. It does not mean you do not love them or care about them it just means at that moment you have had E N O U G H !!!! Something you may have said to them five thousand times and cautioned them about but they still went ahead and did it!!! That is a time when the urge to strangle may emerge...I have felt it at least once...the good news for me was it passed almost as quickly as it came.

  8. rave1432 profile image61
    rave1432posted 11 years ago

    No I don't think so. I have had to deal with peoples kids, around 10, who act 3, and I wanted to strangle her every day. She acted that way on purpose and got no discipline. I think a child can be disciplined but not beaten. There is a difference. I got a whipping and I am a lot better of a person because of it. I see studies where it harms them mentally, but I don't think it is true. Kids need to be kids and kids need to make mistakes and learn and have a way to learn, a boot in the butt, or a belt, will help.

    1. profile image51
      pinapple123posted 10 years agoin reply to this

      You don't think it's true? Well. I am a living proof. Take it or leave it. But don't assume what can or can't affect others.

  9. coffeegginmyrice profile image83
    coffeegginmyriceposted 11 years ago

    I don't see it turning us into a bad parent. And I definitely agree that there should be no physical act involved in it or that could be easily deemed as abuse or violence. With anger, stupid expressions could come out from our mouths candidly; and if you add humour to your angry words, then the kids will not feel too hurt. Example: "I'll throw you out of the window." They know that this is IMPOSSIBLE to happen to them. Here's my advice.  smile

    I had many times expressed this kind of anger moments to my girls when they were 12 and 15 respectively; the tough ages to deal with of growing up. This age bracket is the period when they demonstrate to become really stubborn, air-headed, make up lies, slamming of bedroom doors, turning off their cellphones when mom or dad is calling, become lazy with chores, being pushy and demanding, breaking curfew hours, and would almost hit you back if you threaten to hurt them. I can totally see myself the way I had acted during my teens.

    But never, never put a hand on them. Talk to your children one-on-one, heart-to-heart behind closed doors. Be a good listener and politely persist to let them listen to you as well. Throw in a short story of your childhood as an example, so they can see themselves in that pattern (this usually worked between me and pa during my time). If you get them to pour out and/or find both of you in tears, then you will know that you have successfully touched your kid's heart and mind.

    Explain your ways of discipline that it is only out of LOVE and ask your kid if he/she can agree to that.  Refrain from leaving the room unless the situation has been settled. End your private conversation with each other's exchange of acceptance and apologies; tight hugs and kisses. Be fair. Close the deal with the big words: "I LOVE YOU."

    P.S. I received all the types of discipline when I was a kid, and had molded me to become a better person and mother to my kids. Sorry. It's a long reply. Hope it has given some sense to your question. Cheers!

  10. lovelife08 profile image59
    lovelife08posted 11 years ago

    Of course not. All parents get frustrated.

    Children are extremely demanding from the time they are born all the way up until they are old enough to understand that you can't see to their every single need right when they need them.

    Babies, toddlers, little kids...they'll throw fits, and you will reach the end of your rope...several times. It is perfectly okay to get frustrated with them. It does not mean at all that you love them any less.

  11. profile image0
    Hubert Williamsposted 11 years ago

    No. Strangling them does. I believe that all parents, if they are honest, have these frustrations. During these times try to focus on the reasons you love them. That's what I do, immediately after I yell. I'm not sure which helps the situation most.

    1. profile image51
      pinapple123posted 10 years agoin reply to this

      honestly. All people have this type of thoughts sometimes. Not just parents.  Heck, I wanted to make my father trip on the stairs on a banana. Because he couldn't accept my homosexual feelings.

  12. profile image51
    pinapple123posted 10 years ago

    does wanting to make your father trip  on a banana on the stairs make you a murderer, when you finally decide not to do it? I don't think so. Your child and my father are affected by our actions. Not our thoughts. Heck, if thoughts were dangerous. I would have killed all humanity and I would be the only one on earth. What a hell.


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)