When is it ok to discuss with your spouse in front of the children?
I would say it depends on your children's ages and maturity levels. Plus, will they be able to handle the disappointment, if they are excited about the prospect of another baby. I do regret that fact that Lindsay felt rejection when I was too tired/ill to play with her and she didn't know why. We have talked about it since. Personally, I tend to be upfront but try to stay age appropriate and encourage questions. The fact that Lindsay lived with her mother and visited twice a week was part of the reason I had hoped we could get through it without her noticing. Best of luck with all of it!
When you are discussing things like why you love them, or are proud of them.
Or using their current feelings to explain about life, for instance if they are really sad and a bit withdrawn due to the loss of a parent. This can provide comfort to your kids by letting them know why Mommy is sad, but also provide you with an opportunity to have a conversation about death, grieving and then carrying on with happy memories and how to continue on with life because it doesn't stop.
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