If you grew up in a very large family(7 or more children), how did it effect you

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   gmwilliamsposted 12 years ago

   If you grew up in a very large family(7 or more children), how did it effect you?

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   SimpleGiftsofLoveposted 12 years ago

   Altogether, there were 9 with step-brothers and sisters, and 2 half-sisters.  I felt lost in the shuffle most of the time, and after my half-sister was born we became responsible for her.  I wanted freedom to make friends and go places.  I resented the responsibility, even going so far as to run away to get my parent's attention.  I paid the price, and it has caused me not to be close to her at all.

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      gmwilliamsposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      The oldest child in very large families have NO CHILDHOOD.  They are the ONES who raise the younger siblings, not the parents.   Oldest children in very large families lead a life analagous to that of slaves and forced laborers, on 24/7/365.

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   healthwealthmusicposted 12 years ago

   I grew up in a Mennonite home of seven children. I would say that the pros and cons likely balanced themselves out However, me being the third to youngest, I do know that I felt like I was usually treated as the childish little one - I had one sister and 5 brothers. My sister was nine years older than me, and the oldest of the children. I think things might have been different if she had been closer to my age. As it was, my mom and her always seemed to be talking big people talk and were best buddies. I always felt like the third wheel....  even now, although I am a married adult, when my sister and I are at my parents' house at the same time, she always seems to be the one my mom talks to most. I get the feeling of being unimportant. I had more fun playing with my brothers. My sister never really had fun with me.

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   carolpposted 12 years ago

   I have 3 brothers and 4 sisters. Having a big family is a blessing. I learn and understand the importance of a family, loving, sharing, supporting, helping and undesrtanding one another. We shared the household shores and each has a responsibility each day. I learned to budget my monthly money allowance during my college days together with my sisters and brothers.
   To hold on together in good and bad times. keep our family tradition and practice it in my own family.

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      SaritaJBonitaposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      You are fortunate indeed.  Not very many large families are so emotionally healthy.  I'm envious (in a good way, I just can't think of a more appropriate word)

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   shyprn14posted 12 years ago

   One of my parents, grew up in a large family. I was told, that growing up, in a large family? It makes you, have to grow up fast; because you have to help, take care of the other siblings. So, you really do not, get to have a real childhood.The childhood took, a back seat, to have to, help raise the younger ones. They were a close knit family, but also everyone, still had their own ways, of doing things. But not the way, the older ones were taught, to do things. The younger ones, the way of doing things, got a little less harsh, as to the way, things were supposed to have been done properly. Which; later on made the older ones, resentful toward the younger ones. Because the older ones, done things the way, that things were told, of them to do. And, no other way, because there was, no other way, but just the one way.

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      gmwilliamsposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      That is so true.   My mother came from a family of 10 children.  She was the oldest and left home at 14 one of my aunts, who was the next oldest girl, raised the younger siblings.  She had no childhood and is bitter to this day.

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   lisasuniquevoiceposted 12 years ago

   I grew up as the second oldest of nine children.I was the only girl until my  sister came along seven years later. It was always "You iron the shirt, you're the girl..." Or, I would end up babysitting all of the time and there were always at least two babies at one time, all of the timel. When I was twelve I swore I'd never have children because I had changed enough diapers for a lifetime.I did have one child and he's now getting his Master's in architecture at LTU in  Southfield ,Michigan.
   
   Grew up too fast,
   Lisa

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      gmwilliamsposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Lisa, I hear you!   To all concerned, I have written a hub on this very subject, please check it out!   Lisa, you have a son getting a Master's.   You look so young, like you are in your 20s.

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      lisasuniquevoiceposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      gmwilliams,
      I'll read your hub. Thank you for the comment about my age. Today I needed to hear that more than anything.Thanks again.
      I'll be reading,
      Lisa

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   kiranferozposted 12 years ago

   I think if I would had grew up in a large family and i have 7 or more siblings then I would never become bored of life and we all would play together,eat together, and enjoy the life and hangout every weekend...also if i had a elder sister or brother then I could share my feelings and emotions with him or her..He or she would advise me. So it would be great fun...

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   getitriteposted 12 years ago

   I guess statistics suggest that in large families there will inevitably be poverty, physical, and sexual abuse along with neglect.  I grew up in a VERY large family, where those statistics fit perfectly.  I wrote a book about the experience.  Most people think it is a work of total fiction.

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      gmwilliamsposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      You are so correct.   Children in very large families have little or no parental attention.  Older children are cast aside and neglected in favor of younger ones.   Middle children are ignored.  The only ones who "benefit" are the youngest children.

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   SaritaJBonitaposted 12 years ago

   Being the eldest of six children, I'm short one sibling from being truly eligible to answer.  I'm going to cheat and answer anyways because I think this is an excellent question...
   
   Being the oldest had both it's advantages and disadvantages.  I learned how to change diapers in kindergarten, and I lost count of how many family-size boxes of mac n' cheese I've cooked throughout the years.  On the flipside, I learned how to drive first, was the first to get my own car, and got away with a whole lot more "teenage hijinks" than all of my siblings. 
   
   Being the oldest in a large family taught me how to stay calm in crisis situations, how to multi-task, how to handle even the worst temper-tantrums, etc.  The most important thing I think I learned is that life rarely goes according to plan.  Sometimes it sucked but I always survived.   
   
   I'm glad I'm the oldest and not the youngest, because despite all of the stress I love to be the boss ;-)

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