As an adult, what advice do you offer to today's teens, for avoiding the pitfall

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   fpherj48posted 12 years ago

   As an adult, what advice do you offer to today's teens, for avoiding the pitfalls of peer pressure?
   
   When in a position to influence/guide teens, what do you tell them about "peer pressure?"

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   tillsontitanposted 12 years ago

   Oh my dear Effer, what advice will teens listen to, today or any day?  We need to impress them with their own worth and their own ability to make decisions.  If we can instill confidence in themselves, they can handle anything!
   The more fragile will need more guidance, perhaps a more hands on approach (take that in many ways).  The best guidance we can give them is our example...we don't need a new car just because Mr. Next Door has one, we don't want a new flat screen TV just because everyone else is buying one.  If we show them we are our own person they will take up on it subconsciously and deal with their peers in their own time and their own way.  Confidence is the name of the game.
   I think you already know all this but are just looking for other opinions my dear.  I will be watching to see what others say.

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      fpherj48posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      All you say is so true, Grandma.....and yes, I am interested in what others do to handle this issue.  Why?  Because of what I witness quite often, from teens of today.  2 grandchildren through this issue successfully...more on the way!!  Prepare!!

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   lburmasterposted 12 years ago

   Words only hurt if you let them. Think about it. Everyone has words and opinions, but they only have value if you give them value. Remember that when there is more than one person pressuring you, they can act irrationally. That should be a clue to get away as fast as possible but not show signs of fear or they will feel empowered.

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      fpherj48posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Excellent!   I like the way you think!  If you can steer teens.....you've done a wonderful thing for them!

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   duffsmomposted 12 years ago

   That is a difficult one.  A lot of it depends on the personality of the teen. One might be confident, independent, and a child from the same family may be more inclined to go along with the crowd.
   
   We tried to teach our kids to think for themselves, to be confident in who they were. Did it work?  It did but was it our counsel or what it due to their own personalities?  Both of our children seemed to be disgusted by the bad behavior of their peers so I am not sure what influence we had.  I do know that as they grew, followed rules etc, they got more freedom because we trusted their decisions.

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      fpherj48posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      duffsmom.....What did you say?  Both of your children "seemed to be disgusted by the bad behavior of their peers,"  LARGELY BECAUSE OF YOUR INFLUENCE!...so you can be SURE!  Great Job!!!

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   annartposted 12 years ago

   I'm so pleased you asked this question.  I agree with most of the comments here but I'm actually looking for ideas as my 12 year old granddaughter has just started giving my daughter problems!  I'll follow this with great interest and pass such valuable advice on.  Someone's listening to my prayers as I've come across lots on the subject in a few days - amazing!

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      fpherj48posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      annart....First things, first.  No "problems". Your daughter has a "heads-up, & the opportunity to start NOW. Rx: open communication w/o anger or blame, more mother-child time and activities together, firm but loving feedback. Instill self-love.

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      annartposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you so much; it's so good to know there's good advice in these wonderful hubpages!  Enjoy your weekend!  Ann

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   Sunshine625posted 12 years ago

   To be a leader and not a follower. Short and simple advice. I actually just had this conversation today with Faith and her BFF. I believe in training them at a young age to lead.

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      fpherj48posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Amen, gf.....the younger we teach......the more their bright young minds can absorb.  Self-confidence is a MUST!

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   calmclinicposted 12 years ago

   The best thing I think is to help them build their confidence so that they won't succumb to peer pressure. Knowing ones strengths and weaknesses is the key to confidence, it also helps if the parents show moral support at all times.

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      fpherj48posted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Excellent response!   Yes, it is important to help kids really get to know themselves, be proud of their strengths and know to work on the weaknesses....Parents need to understand, I think, that it's vital to "be present," and open to conversation.

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   Sunkist123posted 11 years ago

   The same advice I'd offer them in general:  I'd encourage them to think about their futures-  that they have the potential to have bright futures, and make their lives what they want them to be.  Kids who realize this, and think about it often, are less likely to do things that will ruin their futures.

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      fpherj48posted 11 years agoin reply to this

      excellent  advice.   young  people are so eager  for guidance,,,,,even when  it seems they are not listening!

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