Is giving birth control to our teens saying it's ok to have sex or is avoiding addressing it worse?
Avoidance is worse. You have to look at this issue straight on, stop listening to what others are telling you, and deal with your situation. In my opinion, it is better not to have a 14 year old girl give birth than it is to have her do so. I do not condone teenage sex, but if you believe that it is a strong possibility, then physically do what you can to physically protect your child. Birth control pills and condoms for pregnancy prevention and disease prevention.
I know it's sobering and scary to confront these kinds of issues with our children, but there is a scarier level ~ dealing with grandchildren coming into this world way before it is time, or worse than that, std's.
Well what is more important?
Everyone will eventually have sex, it is important to be responsible about it. All one can do is make a teen understand the complexity and help make right choices. But remember someone who is in their 20s would make just as many mistakes as a teen. Everyone should be treated nicely and as a part of the society. Teens need more support. By saying that we are not going to support you in anyways pushes them to even further miserable choices. Think of yourself being picked on for every mistake, life would become much more difficult isnt it.
There is need for much better sex education methods and parents need to start opening up channels of dialogues before opening channels of anger.
No, giving birth control pills to our teens is not saying that it is ok to have sex. But it does says that we trust you and we want you safe.
Let's face it, parents: nobody in their right teenage mind listens to a word you say. Teenagers do whatever they want (it kind of defines them.) Birth control is just making sure you're not a grandparent before you should be one. And for females taking the pill, it's also good for acne, PMS, and mood swings.
Children should be taught the values of life when they are young and you too should set an example with your exemplary behavior. It is essential that they be told to keep a dignified distance from the opposite sex and if you do so your children will know the repercussions of free sex.
I have a teenage son. We talk about sex and I monitor him and his girlfriend very closely. He is 15, and yes they have been talking about doing it. I was shocked when I found out after he got grounded from his phone. I read all the text back in forth from them. We had one of the longest talks ever about the subject. Now he talks to me about everything. He asks my advice and we couldnt be closer. I called his girlfriends mom and we talked too. Trust me they wont be let alone anytime soon. I know he is gonna have sex on day, and I want him protected. Its better to be safe than sorry.
Teens are going to explore their sexuality with or without their parent's approval. To neglect teaching your child to be safe and providing the tools for him or her to do so is risky.
I encouraged my daughters to use birth control, but I also monitored their activities with boys very, very closely. They were not confused about whether they had permission to have sex. They KNEW the answer was no, and that if I learned about it they'd have to face the music.
I used to feel differently about this issue before becoming a mother. Avoiding the issue is far worse. When both my sons get older I would not want either of them engaging in sex before marriage. I also would not want them getting a girl pregnant. I plan on sitting them both down and discussing the consequences of sex, pregnancy and std's. Regardless of what we as parents tell our kids in the end they will do what they want. So, it's better to prepare them.
Entirely avoiding it is worse, but it's also not good to give them birth control because that encourages sex. It's an individual choice for parents to make, but I plan to talk with my children(once I have them) about waiting until marriage.
In some way it does say yes to sex but I think by avoiding birth control the outcome will be worse. Having open communication with your child and explaining to them why you agreeing to birth control and probably providing it and hope they make the right choices. Birth control or no birth control, fact is at some point our children will have sex and from there where will it take them.
There can be a difference between "giving birth control to teens" and "not giving birth control to teens but also NOT avoiding addressing the matter".
You should never avoid a problem when it comes to teens. They will make things right in their own mind by either listening to their peers or doing what they think is best. Teens, as much as they hate to admit it, need a more experienced adult to give them guidence. As for the birth control a teen is going to do what they want no matter what sometimes it is best to take precautions.
Teens don't need permission to have sex, quite the opposite actually. It's the lack of permission that makes it even more appealing. Honest communication and information about sex and all that goes with it works better than some might think. It takes the mystery out of it and gives parents the chance to make their views on it very clear. At the end of the day, each person has to make their own choice. For teens who do choose to be sexualy active, it is extremely common for them to regret it immediately. Help them protect themselves so they don't have to suffer life long consequences for one mistake.
I think, from personal experience, that I would have been less likely to get pregnant had my parents given me contraceptives. They are prudes, nonetheless and in fact "banned" me from even kissing a boy with more than a closed mouth. Being a TEENAGER I rebelled and became sort of a deviant. I got in trouble in school for sex related reasons. I began to run around with whoever I thought was worthy, and it actually ruined my self esteem. Ultimately I ended up a mommy. The point is that by avoiding the subject, my parents reaffirmed that they were not interested in being a part of my personal life. They wanted control and nothing more, and that hurt me. The teenage response is to lash out in whatever way would get the most attention. So if you are outlawing sex you are triggering that response. But if you sit down and say "Hey, I don't condone it, but if you do it anyway please be safe because I love you." Those words could make all the difference.
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