Can you forgive someone who did worst for you?

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   ezba29posted 9 years ago

   Can you forgive someone who did worst for you?
   
   Whether we can have heart to forgive someone who did bad for us even we can't imagine how bad it was?  If you forgive can you forget those worst moments?

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   threekeysposted 9 years ago

   Hi ezba29 to survive the hurt and damage it is for own good to somehow make as much peace with the transgressor. That process is trial and error. Time can subdue the intensity and depth of hurt and pained  feelings. You may not be able to forgive but neither will you be in the situation where your heart is either in deep pain that you think you could die of a heart attack. Or through feelings of hurt and hate you have switched the alkaline ph of your body into corrosive car battery acid which could very well lead to the creation of ulcers and/or  cancers. It's in your best interest to work on forgiveness for these two main reasons:-
   1.Dont give yout transgressor anymore sadistic pleasure in seeing you suffer.
   2. So you dont die of a pained heart attack or cancer you just have to be self preventative with your emotional and physical health through mind tools. The positive side of such experiences?
   Time will fade the hurt and will  eventually teach you the best know how means  to improve and refine your discernment skills with people. Now that doesn't mean neccessarily you are are always "eyes wide open" so to speak. But you will be more able to deal more easily if it comes your way again.
   Im not sure if I answered your question but that is the best of what I can offer you at this point in time as "I am in it" at the moment.

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      ezba29posted 9 years agoin reply to this

      Ya you mentioned good points. .everyone would have come across this kind of pain in life...though we can't forgive but I will think god is there to punish them and even it happened..

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   tamarawilhiteposted 9 years ago

   The Biblical version of forgiveness requires:
   A. they stop committing the wrong
   B. they offer recompense like take punishment or pay back the damages
   C. you can then choose to forgive them
   
   Too many people jump to step C, repeatedly forgiving wrongs, which enables the other person to continue doing the wrongs - and enabling such wrongdoing is immoral.
   And you can let go of the anger about it without the far liberal view of "oh, I accepted his apology, don't punish him". The punishment will ensure that person won't repeat the wrong and deter others who observe it from committing the wrong. And that's why reacting to "please forgive me" with "no, don't punish them" is enabling.

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      ezba29posted 9 years agoin reply to this

      Well Tamara wilhite you listed valuable points. .Thank you for sharing. ..three points are applicable for different situations because we can't forgive all time..depends on the person and depth of pain we can decide right!

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   Matthew Woolseyposted 9 years ago

   I'm no biblical scholar, but why way I have come to understand forgiveness, is that forgiveness is not really for the person you are forgiving. Forgiving someone is for you, by forgiving them you can move on and not have to hold on to whatever they had done to you.

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