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Has anyone been abused by a famoly member or a close friend ???
So basically my mate is in desprate need of advice of anyone who has been in this persition and how to over come it as its effecting her adult life and has no contact with her family anymore as the abuser was a family member and went prison but is back out and living with family and she feels she just can't get past it or over come the anger she feels for them ! Also she has developed compulsive lying dissorder because of the years she actually wad abused for and her family has disowned her because of that helppppp please no judging!!!!
Therapy is a must! But she have to be the one who is willing to seek for help in order to move on.
In my case, no one in my family knew (and still doesn't). The best thing I did for myself was moved hundreds of miles away and kept myself occupied....
It's best for her to keep her distance from her family. As a friend, you and anyone else in your circle should keep her mind off of them and provide her with the support and attention she needs. Don't bring up the subject unless she does. As it can cause some PSTD...
She said she has tryed therapy and it has worked to a certain degree but she is still not there yet. I as her friend never mention it untill she talks about it but I dunno what more I can say to her she is just stuck in the anger side its not nice
Developing her own life (excluding her family) to the fullest may be a way to help her cope. If she is focused on creating her own family, or a new career choice, or traveling, or whatever it may be that she chooses to do, it could help her see that her life can be fulfilled and happy in the present, regardless of her past. I too have some pretty horrible scars from the past, but I have made sure to focus on creating happiness for myself in the present.. for me it makes the sting of the past hurt a little less.
The book "Unpacking Forgiveness" by Chris Brauns has been tremendously helpful to many people who have suffered abuse.
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