How to love your stepchild when they hate you?

  1. profile image61
    AimTomasposted 21 months ago

    How to love your stepchild when they hate you?

  2. profile image0
    threekeysposted 21 months ago

    Aim, I have not been in this specific situation but if I were? This is how I would approach it.
    Some things I would say to your stepchild are....
    1. Your mother is your mother. I am not here to be your mother or ask you to choose who you like or love more. However, because I am an adult and our father and I have created this home for us, I will have house rules for all of us to follow. Especially, until you are 18 or desire to leave this home. We all are responsible for creating a safe and loving home. So that ee grow to undetstand this home is your refuge not your battlrground. I hope this home becomes a safe place for you to share your thoughts and feelings with either your dad or myself.
    2. I want to be your guiding friend/mentor while we share this home. I am not perfect but I promise you I will always be willing to talk things over or just listen. If I cannot handle you or the situation, I will tell you and I will take time out until Im ready to come back to you.
    3. You dont have to love me but I hope I earn your respect.
    4. You can always ask me anything. I can't promise you I will have the correct answer for you but I will do my best to respond.
    Then, allow time for the everyday trust to build between you. Your step child may not love you at the moment but he may well grow to like you if you dont humiliate him. That is, show him how you value him.
    I hope that helps in some little way.

  3. gmwilliams profile image83
    gmwilliamsposted 21 months ago

    Well, it is quite natural for stepchildren to hate their stepparents.  Studies show that stepparents don't treat their stepchildren well.  Studies also authenticate that in stepfamilies, there are higher incidences of neglect & abuse than in what is defined as normative families.  Stepparents tend to treat their blood children better than their stepchildren because they aren't blood related to those children.   It is seldom that stepparents & stepchildren will have close, loving relationships.  There is an antipathy there.  Stepparents are off-putting to the average stepchild.    The stepchild simply views the stepparent as an intrusion to the family. That is why it is strongly advised that a widowed or divorced parents shouldn't marry until the child/children are grown.


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)