I usually stay away from the personal things online, I go through a lot to protect our identity, but I just want to get some things off my chest.
I have a soon-to-be 3 year old son who has communication difficulties. We still don't know exactly what is wrong, but we are working on it. We've been to see several doctors, and found out that his hearing isn't perfect, but not bad enough that he should be having this much trouble communicating. We are looking into things like Apraxia now, and I want nothing more than to figure out how to help him. He gets so frustrated because he doesn't know how to tell us things, he ends up screaming a lot. He can say 4 or 5 words, but they don't come out right(cup is tut). He understands us to a degree, but we usually have to physically show him where to go or what to do, rather than tell him. It's difficult to deal with, and unfortunately it's not all.
My wife was constantly in the hospital with him, ended up in the ICU for 3 weeks, and spent another 4-week stretch in the neurological department because she had lost all feeling from her waist down. She recovered from everything after his birth, and did well until she got pregnant with our little girl. It was more of the same story with her. Pre-term labor, bleeding, we had a down-syndrome scare, an infection scare, but finally we had our little girl in perfect health at 37 weeks.
Needless to say, it was very difficult for me to hold down a full-time job during either pregnancy. I was constantly rushing home to take her to the hospital or pick up our son from the hospital. I've worked a lot of entry-level jobs over the last 3 years, all of which were with myself and the employer understanding my job history and that my availability could go at any moment.
Our beautiful baby girl was our last, we just knew we needed her for our family to be complete. After I brought her and my wife home from the hospital, I started another job as a pest control technician. It had long hours but relatively good pay, but I was glad because our savings had almost dried up.
I noticed one morning my wife was complaining about pain getting worse ever since she gave birth, so I took her to the doctor, and they found out she had a bad postpartum infection that had been getting worse and worse. She was put on bedrest with a 2-week antibiotic program, and the doctor even stopped by the house twice to make sure it didn't get any worse, or my wife would need surgery.
Well, I had to stay home, we had no other option for taking care of our two children, so that's another job down the drain.
I consider myself a pretty faithful person... God has always taken care of us, and the trials have always been worth it, I'm just feeling very overwhelmed at the moment. I'm supposed to hear back tomorrow about a job I can do from home, where I can pick my work anywhere from 10-40 hours a week. I've been so sick with worry over this job, I'm not sure what I'll do if I don't get it.
Anyway... I figured maybe it would help to type this up...
