I'd like feedback on my article: Relationships with a variety of purposes.

1. 52

   Aya aya ahmedposted 7 years ago

   Hi Hubbers,
   
   I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my article Relationships with  a variety of purposes. (must be signed in to view). What can I do to improve? Thanks!

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   1. 88

      theraggededgeposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Hi,
      
      I'm afraid your English is not up to the required standard for HubPages.
      
      The best thing to do is to focus on improving your written English, and then come back and try again.

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2. 0

   pen promulgatesposted 7 years ago

   Hi Aya,
   
   I have to agree with theraggededge.
   
   We could point out errors, but there are too many mistakes in your article.
   
   Some tips I can give are:
   1) Don't write long sentences.
   2) Don't write such big paragraphs. Break them down.
   3) Learn punctuation rules. (There should be a space after comma and full stop).
   4) Write on apps like Grammarly. It will correct most of the errors in your sentences. However, you still have to work a lot on sentence structure.
   
   Hope these help.
   Good luck.

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3. 60

   FatFreddysCatposted 7 years ago

   "Human beings only sought for a substitute to their thirsty hearts through the casual coupling of adolescents ,didn't they ? As a start you can spot an answer by relationship goals expressed at the social media which is endowed with all sorts of love quotes ,posts &romantic scenes that appeal to the majority &their daily dreams of falling in love & being loved ."
   
   ...that's about as far as I got. Sorry. (pulls rip cord, bails out)
   

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   1. 95

      greenmindposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      But as free verse, it's kind of beautiful.

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4. 83

   Stephanie Purserposted 7 years ago

   Hi Aya,
   
   I do think it is mostly proper grammar holding you back here. Your article is for the most part, one big paragraph with almost no full stops.
   I think your ideas need evidence also. Your making a lot of statements about relationships without a lot of informative content. So that when I read it it comes across as solely your opinion.
   I'd start by adding some subtitles and breaking your article into sections. I'd also suggest a more specific title, this one is a bit vague.
   I do wish you lots of luck!
   
   Steph

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5. 73

   SSS1942posted 7 years ago

   Hi Aya,
   
   The first para is too long. Now a days, a reader used to read an article in their mobile phones. So, you have to present it in reader's point of view.
   
   Try to break the write up into small articles. Give some heading in capsule. Use some related pictures within the article.
   
   Best of luck.

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