Why is being nice to other people looked as something weak by some people?

1. 66

   Stickyponyposted 11 years ago

   Why is being nice to other people looked as something weak by some people?

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2. 60

   duffsmomposted 11 years ago

   I have to admit I have never experienced that. I don't know anyone who looks at kindness as weak. One of the things that attracts me to particular people is seeing them behave in a kind way.
   
   What makes you think that some people think being nice to people is weak?  I have just never experienced anything like that.

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3. 61

   THEmikeLOposted 11 years ago

   "People often mistake kindness for weakness" i have heard this said so many times and i think its true.  Some people believe that if someone is kind that they don't have the strength to make a very important decision.  Also that they probably aren't good under pressure because they are too kind and can't make a decision that can possibly hurt someone.

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4. 91

   Theophanesposted 11 years ago

   Generally people who believe this are way too self-absorbed or have psychopathic or anti-social tendencies. I have come across people bashing giving to charities in other countries because of reasons like, "Well why can't you help your own?!" (by this they usually mean them - however subconsciously) or "Why should you just give money to anyone you don't know/ Why can't they just help themselves?!" Again, this lack of empathy is disturbing and I try to weed out these toxic people from my life. They're never going to be a positive influence.

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5. 77

   calynbanaposted 11 years ago

   Depends on what you mean when you say nice. Being nice is not necessarily a good thing. Often when a situation comes up where one can either be "nice" or be honest they will choose the "nice" path. This would be the weaker choice in many cases where it would have been more loving, and stronger to take the honesty route.
   
   The word nice used to mean foolish, or stupid. Now we often describe people who are pleasant, polite, and sometimes foolishly kind as "nice". Think about the people you would describe as nice, and whether or not you would list superficial reasons, or deep reasons why you would describe them that way. Often when I ask this question people list superficial reasons. They smile, they are agreeable, they are polite, they are just being nice.
   
   It is really easy to be nice. It is a lot harder to be loving and kind. Nice can fade away like somebody taking off a mask, being nice can often just be a charade( I am picturing a cat going from sweet to hiss when you offend them). When somebody is genuinely loving and kind it will remain evident no matter how other people behave.
   
   Example: A woman is having relationship issues. She is in an abusive relationship but is seeking validation from her friends that she is making the right choice in remaining with her abusive partner. One friend takes the nice approach, "You should do what you need to do, what your heart feels is right,if he makes you happy then you are doing the right thing." the other takes the honest approach, "I will not support you being in a relationship that is hurting you and your children. I really think you should consider whether or not this is the right path." Nice was weak, and honest was strong and loving.
   
   Not the best example but I am falling asleep at my keyboard :p I think I made my point.

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6. 82

   dashingscorpioposted 11 years ago

   I think the only time someone sees being "nice" as being weak is when they feel the person should be "assertive" in a given situation. This may range from allowing others to impose their will on you to accepting inferior service in a restaurant where there is hair in your food...etc without (speaking up).
   Some people are afraid of confrontation so they bend over backwards to avoid it at all cost. These are the people that get "tested" over and over again.

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7. 72

   soconfidentposted 11 years ago

   Some people tend to take advantage of a kind person these days.

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