How to avoid being hot tempered?

1. 72

   dashingscorpioposted 9 years ago

   
   
   Anger is the Mask that Hurt wears.
   Before "blowing up" it's important to ask yourself (why) this bothers/hurts you so much. Is it really about (this) incident? Are you just angry in general because you feel people have taken advantage of you, disrespected you, or deep down you simply believe (no one) really cares about you and you have to "fight" for everything.
   It's nearly impossible to be (one word from angry) and happy in life.
   Blowing up at someone hurts you more than the other person. It's (your) blood pressure that rises, your heart that accelerates, your body that fills with tension, you're the one who comes off looking like a screaming idiot in front of others, being put at risk for being fired, having someone breakup or divorce you, seen as someone who lacks control of their emotions or viewed as acting like an immature child....
   Don't sweat the "small stuff". Note: It's all small stuff!
   Decide not to (let other people) push (your) buttons!
   Learn to be calm, cool, collected, and calculating if needed.
   What is the "upside" to having an hot temper? People leave you alone? No one wants to be "close" to you? People lie more to you because they feel you can't handle the truth, You're seen as bi-polar, a bully, or unstable or possibly terrifying... ect No one trusts or wants to be around the "hot head" and those who are become "passive aggressive" rather than tell you they disagree.
   Respect leads to admiration.
   Fear leads to avoidance.

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2. 61

   RLWalker LMposted 9 years ago

   There was a piece of ancient advice or something like that that I heard shared in a video. The story goes something like this:
   
   There was a very rich man who had one son that he loved very much and when he neared the end of his life and decided how his wealth was to be divided, his son asked what portion he would get. The only thing that his father left him was a piece of simple advice. That if he should ever become angered by someone, he should not respond but wait 24 hours and then respond if he wished. Because this was the only thing his father left him he heeded the advice and in his own later years said that it was the most valuable thing his father could of given to him, greater than any of the objects of wealth that he could have given him, and he became a very wise and successful man because of it.
   
   From my own experience, more than half of the things I regret doing in life, I did in anger. Because of this I still get angry but am never quick to act on it. I would rather be a pushover than a perpetrator because I find guilt, shame and regret more heavy on the mind and heart than, fear or sorrow and with wisdom we learn to find a path in between.

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3. 85

   peachpurpleposted 9 years ago

   learn to count on your own in your heart 1-10, should calm down
   Learn to self manage anger with lot of readings
   Ignore those people

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