If you're an adult oldest child, do you STILL shoulder most of the financial res

Jump to Last Post 1-4 of 4 discussions (9 posts)
  1. gmwilliams profile image82
    gmwilliamsposted 2 years ago

    If you're an adult oldest child, do you STILL shoulder most of the financial responsibilities

    for your original family, even financially supporting grown younger siblings even paying their bills, much  to the detriment/chagrin of your spouse & children?  Are you expected to shoulder most, if not all the financial responsibilities while your younger siblings DON'T? Are you your family's constant ATM? In multichild families, adult oldest children are expected to carry their original family financially.It isn't unusual for adult oldest children to FOREGO their, their spouses', & even their children's financial comfort to financially support GROWN siblings. Oldest one, I feel YOUR pain!


  2. tamarawilhite profile image91
    tamarawilhiteposted 2 years ago

    An older adult sibling should not be responsible for the financial bills of younger adult siblings - they are adults and should pay their own way.

    1. gmwilliams profile image82
      gmwilliamsposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      EXACTLY!  But this scenario is very common in multichild families.  Oldest children oftentimes financially support or assist younger siblings who are QUITE CAPABLE of supporting themselves but they WON'T & even EXPECT to be supported financially!

  3. gmwilliams profile image82
    gmwilliamsposted 2 years ago


    Many adult oldest children have spoken & unspoken expectations that they are to financially foot the bills, assist, & support adult younger siblings.  This doesn't occur so much in smaller families; however, this occurrence is quite rife & especially true in larger families. Oldest children are inculcated that younger siblings are THEIR responsibility from childhood & that the needs of younger siblings take precedence, even supersedes their own.  As a result of such inculcation or rather indoctrination, it isn't unusual even in adulthood for adult oldest children to shoulder most, if not all, the financial burdens of younger siblings.   

    There are adult oldest children who would curtail, even forego their socioeconomic lifestyle to financial aid, assist, & support younger siblings although the latter ARE QUITE CAPABLE of supporting themselves.  Adult oldest children are oftentimes seen by their adult younger siblings as a walking, talking, thinking ATM.  They feel that they are OBLIGATED to sacrifice themselves for their younger siblings who oftentimes come to expect, even demand that the former financially support them for the rest of their lives.  It is quite common for adult oldest children to forfeit their socioeconomic lifestyle of their spouses & even children to financially support adult younger siblings & even the latter's families.

  4. manatita44 profile image84
    manatita44posted 2 years ago

    Hi Grace, seems a big one for you, no? I am the first as mentioned in a similar question. I started work at 15 and yes, I did bring home the wages. I left Grenada at 21 and still continued. I was married at 29 and very soon after I stopped or became erratic in my contributions. I told mom and she understood.

    We are seven and I have to say that all feel a strong sense of family and Team Spirit. We never had issues I know of. In England I see Fillipinos and Africans sending money home all the time. Some are the eldest. They do this happily and would not dream of not sending money back home to help out.

    Am I permitted to intrude? Do you find this a burden and if so why? I think that the Caribbean and African way are similar and I suspect this kind of spirit has been happening in small cities and countries for a very long time. So tell me about America. Would be interesting to know. Much Love.

    1. gmwilliams profile image82
      gmwilliamsposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      Doing that makes people dependent & lazy.  Why should you sacrifice your life & lifestyle?  They should do for themselves period!!

    2. manatita44 profile image84
      manatita44posted 2 years agoin reply to this

      I don't know, Grace. Mum worked hard all her life. My brother too. My Sister is in Houston with cancer type 4 and  still works hard. My other brothers and sister are all working hard and helping others. If you're resentful, you will not be happy.

    3. gmwilliams profile image82
      gmwilliamsposted 2 years agoin reply to this

      Of course, people ARE resentful.  They aren't supposed to SUPPORT GROWN PEOPE who OUGHT to SUPPORT THEMSELVES. That is what wrong w/family.  An INBUILT welfare system- EACH TUB SITS ON ITS OWN BOTTOM. If family REFUSE TO WORK, they SHOULD STARVE!!!

    4. manatita44 profile image84
      manatita44posted 2 years agoin reply to this

      Some of your questions seem connected. Of course you have my Love. I do not wish to change, just inspire. Continue with the way of Love, not submission or rejection. Perhaps a whole new kind of inner spring-cleaning is required. I bid you much Peace.


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)