Fear of flying with my daughter

1. 88

   Anolindeposted 14 years ago

   Hi!  I am currently planning to take my 3.5 year old daughter on a short trip to the US.  The problem is I have developed this irrational fear of flying.  It's never been a problem with me before I had my daughter.  I used to fly at least once or twice a year, every year, and I had no fear of it whatsoever. 
   
   We have flown together once before (short flight to Guam) November of last year, but my husband was with us.  At the time, I thought, well, at least if our plane crashes, all three of us would all go together.  But for this trip, my husband won't be coming along (can't afford plane tickets for 3 people) and I am just so scared that something might happen to us.  I would feel so helpless because there would be nothing I could do to protect my daughter.  I can't imagine how I would try to comfort my daughter those last few minutes should anything happens.  The worst thing is the more I imagine this, the more real it appears to me in my mind.  Logically, though, I know this is totally irrational and flying is (supposedly) the safest way to travel. 
   
   So, I'm just wondering if other parents have this same kind of fear?  Any ideas or suggestions on what I can do about this?   Thanks!

   replyreport
   1. 63

      prettydarkhorseposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Bring a toy she like in your carry on bag. She can sense when you are scared, and wyanjen is right there. You'll be ok with your daughter. Enjoy your trip,

      replyreport
2. 70

   Pearldiverposted 14 years ago

   Face Your Fear and get over it.
   Don't invent things that can limit your ability to enjoy yourself in this short life that we have.

   replyreport
3. 76

   wildernessposted 14 years ago

   I used to be an avid snow skiier - 1000's of times I sat on a little wide open snow covered seat with slick nylon pants.  Never thought about it as I passed 50 or 100 above the ground.
   
   I quit skiing pretty much and visited a park in California with a gondola up the mountain.  I nearly froze with fear, I guess, on that ride.  Couldn't move or look out.  Very odd feeling and no fun at all.
   
   A couple of years later saw an amusement park ride I wanted to go on - they haul you straight up for 200 feet or so and drop you.  I finally decided I'd try it and had a ball.
   
   Why do I bring it up?  Whatever the irrational fear was, it lasted one trip up that mountain and went away.  You may find out that once airborne you're fine.  Take a tranquilizer before you get to the airport and hope for the best.

   replyreport
4. 70

   wyanjenposted 14 years ago

   Don't let your fear transfer to your daughter. If you're nervous and worried, she will be too.
   
   
   Have a good trip

   replyreport
5. 70

   Beth100posted 14 years ago

   This happened to me too, but the more I allowed the fear to invade my head, the bigger it became.  Instead of focussing on the fear, I focussed on who I would be travelling swith (my 1 month old baby and my daughter) and concentrated all my thoughts on where we were heading, what we would do there and how much fun we'd have.  I engaged my daughter with trip planning by using the internet and magazines as sources of reference to get her excited. As I became more positive and excited (especially with her excitement), the fear became less and less.  By the time we boarded the plane, I had a small hint of worry, but not any more than normal.  Enjoy your trip and think of the great time she'll have!

   replyreport
6. 72

   FrankiesGirl6Yrposted 14 years ago

   I would try to not even think about crashing. When the airline industry gives figures about its safety record, it quotes statistics showing that there are about 0.03 fatalities per 100 million kilometres flown, compared with 0.10 fatalities per 100 million kilometres for rail travel and 0.175 per million kilometres for cars. In other words, they are saying that air travel is about 3 times safer than rail travel and 5 times safer than car travel per 100 million kilometres of distance travelled.
   So I would think of it this way..If you do not panic every time you and your daughter ride in the car,worring about the flight is like jumping 10X ahead of the much more dangerous activity you do every day

   replyreport
7. 88

   Anolindeposted 14 years ago

   Thanks all   It did make me feel a bit better.  Maybe I should just go do a little meditation or something

   replyreport
   1. 60

      Originposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      You'll be just fine

      replyreport
      1. 88

         Anolindeposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         

         replyreport
8. 61

   dannywoodpxposted 14 years ago

   you can think that flying is more secure than driving in some roads...it helps

   replyreport
9. 78

   Polly Cposted 14 years ago

   Like Frankie'sGirl said, the chances of there being a problem are so remote. Flying is one of the safest ways of travelling - perhaps the very safest. It's just that plane crashes make big news, whereas road traffic accidents do not, usually. I understand where your fear is coming from, because as a mother you want to protect your child from everything - every parent does. And people fear flying because they don't feel in control, and right up there in the sky that can be a scary thought, if you allow it to be. I think lots of people have fleeting thoughts about something going wrong, but the moment the plane takes off they forget about it. Well, I have done that anyway.
   Put your fears aside and go for it - then it will be easier next time!

   replyreport
   1. 88

      Anolindeposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Polly, thanks for understanding   I really think it's because I'll be flying with my daughter that made me have this fear all of a sudden.  I don't think I'll be half as nervous if I were to be flying alone (okay, maybe I would still worry that I'd die and leave her motherless at the tender age of 3). 

      replyreport