I need to come up with a really crappy holiday gift for an inlaw I can not stand. It can't be...
outright crappy because I don't want my spouse to look bad-any suggestions? The inlaw is a really big jerk who constantly brags about what he has and how great he is and thinks he's superior to everyone around him. The last time I went to his house (several years ago) he told my 80 year old grandmother that she smelled like embalming fluid just 2 months before she died! He thought it was hilarious! He is such a butthole I can't stand him. And yes he does look just like the picture I attached.
I read about your question and thought about it a lot and i have 3 answers.
1) Play a prank on you'r inlaw. It may be a good or a dirty prank but this depends apon you! He will understand that what he did till now was very wrong and he will be embaressed and cry and ask for you'r forgiveness.
2) Send him for an Holiday to a far off island for at least 2 weeks.
3) Buy him a new house somewhere very far from you'r area so let him stay there and keep on visiting him for at least a week and then stop going over to his place.
I HOPE MY ANSWER HELPED YOU.
Giving a cr#p gift is low-class, passive-aggressive, and cowardly, making you as horrid as him. Give NO gift and stay away from any gathering where he will be -- If asked why, answer that the man is an abuser and you will not accept his behavior or be around him, and stick to this conviction.
Sweet that you care for your spouse not to look bad! Have to answer this one...
Its tempting to suggest a small bottle of embalming fluid as a gift for this jerk but how about a pictorial coffee table book that has lots of great pictures and doesn't cost a lot (look at the markdown bins first to keep the cost down- that way you win you buy something awesome and totally not useful but awesome and inexpensive too)
You know things he brags about like places he's been or cars he's had or what have you get a book that has those in them and write an inscription inside the cover that's classy like "For man who's been there done that hope this brings back memories its totally not useful and that's the point. Enjoy." It should have sumptuous pictures and not too much reading think about sports cars or football heroes, movie stars, space explorers, good old days, history, Ansel Adams or whatever. Wrap it up like its really special too. Great paper, bow etc maybe even a candy cane. Then he looks like a superjerk when he puts it down and he probably will. Everyone will ooh and awe over the pictures if he does put it down make sure you pass the book around so people can read your inscription and ooh and awe over the brilliant photography. Its a great gift for someone nice too so anyone who puts this gift down shows their lack of class. Gifts are supposed to be from the heart shameful he's such a jerk that it takes the joy from you to give this gift. You get that sense of joy back by being classy and smart and by the love you put into your relationship with your life partner. Blessings to you and yours and take some heart that jerks like him have few mourners that's his just dessert!
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