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FOOT IN MOUTH DISEASE MY FIRST DOSE

Updated on July 19, 2010

INTRODUCTION

 

C’mon admit it we’ve all done it. A word or phrase that just came out at the wrong time or place. Although we had no intent to hurt anyone’s feelings it just turned out that way. We’ve all had Foot-In-Mouth Disease at some time in our life. Causing grief was the last thing on your mind but now it’s too late. You have brought tears to the eyes of a loved one or a dear friend even if it was unintentional.

 

The situation described above is Foot-In-Mouth Disease.  I don’t know a sure cure for Foot-In-Mouth Disease, sometimes a thing just comes out of your mouth at the wrong time, or it doesn’t sound the way you thought it would. There is also the situation when you say something and you weren’t aware of all the ramifications of your spoken word. 

AUNT GERTRUDE AND UNCLE JOHN

One of my own most embarrassing occurrences of Foot-In Mouth Disease was in 1954 when I was seven years old. I had been at the East End playground watching the Pepsi (local semi-pro baseball team) play the Cave Club their greatest rival. The regular umpires hadn’t shown up so umpires had been selected out of the crowd. I thought the umpire selected had really sucked. I truly believed he has cost the Pepsi the game.

As I walked up the hill of Jackson Street after the game was over I was really steamed. As I was walking into my back yard I noticed my Uncle John’s car in the front of the house. I became very excited because I spent a lot of time each summer with Aunt Gertrude and Uncle John at their camp on Fish Creek. I really enjoyed my time on Fish Creek. Particularly since my cousin Chris had been born and now that he was three he was a lot of fun. Even though I was looking forward to going to camp my mood was still dark because of the terrible umpire.

I walked into the back door and sure enough there was Aunt Gertrude and Uncle John. My cousin Chris was also with them, and there was a surprise Chris’ older sister Suzanne (who was twenty) was also with them. Sure enough they were getting ready for a camping trip. My heart leapt with joy as I went upstairs to pack my things for Fish Creek. I got everything ready to go and came back downstairs all ready.

My mom asked me about the baseball game and my mood immediately changed. I told them the worst umpire in the world had robbed the Pepsi team. I said he had to be a crook. Then I saw a look on Uncle John’s face I didn’t recognize as he asked, “Who was this awful umpire?” I replied. “I never heard his name I heard them call him Monk. He even look’s like a monkey!!” Uncle John then asked, “Did you here anyone call him Ray?” I replied, “ That’s amazing how did you know that?” Uncle John then replied with a wry grin, “That’s Suzanne’s fiancée Ray LeMasters his nickname is Monk. He should be here any minute. He and Suzanne will be spending the weekend with us at camp. ”

I don’t think I was a thumb sucker when I was younger but I wanted to curl up in a ball and suck my thumb right on the spot. I noticed mom, Aunt Gertie, and Suzanne in the kitchen tee heeing at my plight. I learned about that look I had seen on Uncle John. He was a very mild mannered man but he had a way of making a point you would never forget.

After I apologized the weekend went swimmingly. Monk was a great guy and I spent many days with him on Fish Creek in the years to come. Uncle John taught me not to be afraid of lightning and thunder at camp. Mom had instilled this fear in me, but Uncle John coaxed me out on the screened porch at camp during a storm. He pointed out the beauty of the lightning and the fear went away.

This is the earliest remembrance I have of Foot-In-Mouth Disease.

Comments

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    • Tom Whitworth profile imageAUTHOR

      Tom Whitworth 

      8 years ago from Moundsville, WV

      agvulpes,

      I'm not wealthy enough to ever be called eccentric I'll just be called plain nuts. As a new fan welcome to my world.

    • agvulpes profile image

      Peter 

      8 years ago from Australia

      G'day Tom you have given us a laugh to end our day, thank you very much!

      And oh yes the foot in mouth disease seems to come back as you get older so watch out it may be contagious. Although it does not seem to matter so much these days, people just say 'oh he is getting eccentric in his old age'

      Great Hub. Oh.. you have a new fan, that would be me :-)

    • Tom Whitworth profile imageAUTHOR

      Tom Whitworth 

      8 years ago from Moundsville, WV

      Pop,

      Thanks for the compliment.

    • breakfastpop profile image

      breakfastpop 

      8 years ago

      Dear Tom,

      That's what keeps the twinkle in your eye and the bounce in your step, among other things

    • Tom Whitworth profile imageAUTHOR

      Tom Whitworth 

      8 years ago from Moundsville, WV

      Pop,

      I wish I had outgrown it but sorry to say some fools never outgrow the foolishness of youth.

    • breakfastpop profile image

      breakfastpop 

      8 years ago

      Terrific hub, Tom. Who hasn't suffered from this disease?

    • Tom Whitworth profile imageAUTHOR

      Tom Whitworth 

      8 years ago from Moundsville, WV

      ready,

      My aunts and uncles helped mom and dad keep a tight leash on me.

    • readytoescape profile image

      readytoescape 

      8 years ago from Central Florida

      Great Story, Reminds me of the old joke I’ve seen displayed often by my own Kids.

      “A large woman is standing in line at the grocery store in front of a small boy and his mother. The large woman’s pager goes off and the little Boy pushes his mom back and yells “look out Mom she’s Backin up”

    • Tom Whitworth profile imageAUTHOR

      Tom Whitworth 

      8 years ago from Moundsville, WV

      eovery,

      I mastered the art at a very young age.

    • eovery profile image

      eovery 

      8 years ago from MIddle of the Boondocks of Iowa

      Open wide, insert foot. I have learned to do this well,

      Keep on hubbing!

    • Tom Whitworth profile imageAUTHOR

      Tom Whitworth 

      8 years ago from Moundsville, WV

      Sheri,

      Thanks for your comment.

    • SheriSapp profile image

      SheriSapp 

      8 years ago from West Virginia

      great hub. We have all been there one time or another!!

    • Tom Whitworth profile imageAUTHOR

      Tom Whitworth 

      8 years ago from Moundsville, WV

      sheila b.

      I think it's a common occurrance.

    • sheila b. profile image

      sheila b. 

      8 years ago

      I, too, have suffered from this disease.

    • Tom Whitworth profile imageAUTHOR

      Tom Whitworth 

      8 years ago from Moundsville, WV

      Robert,

      Isn't it a terrible feeling to spout off and then regret what you've said.

    • Putz Ballard profile image

      Putz Ballard 

      8 years ago

      Good one Tom and I can relate to the foot in mouth disease.

    • Tom Whitworth profile imageAUTHOR

      Tom Whitworth 

      8 years ago from Moundsville, WV

      Thanks Tom, I spent about half my time in the summers at camp with Aunt Gertrude and Uncle John. Uncle John was the mildest mannered man I ever met. We would stay at camp two weeks at a time and he would don his suit and tie every morning to work as an accountant at Fostoria Glass and return in the evening.

    • Tom Cornett profile image

      Tom Cornett 

      8 years ago from Ohio

      I loved this story Tom. Your relatives must have been some fine folks. We all have those moments. Glad yours turned out to be good for you in the end. Two thumbs up and a smile! :)

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