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Micky's Dominatrix-And A Tarwheel Saturday Bike Ride May 5, 2010

Updated on February 16, 2011

Micky's Dominatrix

Make no mistake- cycling is my fun and play! Many will say that when they hurt they stop. If it's not fun for them they stop. If someone says they never suffer- they either have not ridden far or they lie. Cycling is also a source of pain if you go far enough, go fast enough, climb long enough, face a head-wind long enough, etc.

I have commuted in the rain, snow, ice, and tornadoes.

I've ridden many, many hundred milers. I've ridden Paris-Brest-Paris 750 miles, Boston-Montreal-Boston,750 miles in 68 hours, Bike Across Missouri, 560 miles, etc.

I've ridden the Assault On Mount Mitchell 102 miles 12,000 feet elevation gain 30 times. I've too much to keep records.

I've been hit by two cars and a pick-up truck.

If you ride enough you suffer.

The itinerary often includes pain and suffering.

So it is with a little humor that I wrote the poem below.

My bicycle has been the source of much celebration even in the agony of defeat!

Enjoy "Micky's Dominatrix"!

I love my bicycle.


Go ahead and put some soft music on with the video below.

- Compliments of 50 Caliber!

Ana Vidovic

A Tarwheel Saturday Bike Ride May 5, 2010

Micky’s Dominatrix

At least a few times a week, we try,

To get on our bikes and attempt to fly.

What else is close to this kind of soaring?

There’s nothing boring and we’re Always Exploring!

Push the pedal down,

Keep the crank turning around!

Feel the rubber on the road!

Put your head in a different mode!

There’s a silo just up ahead.

And the barn is painted red.

There’s the old farmhouse with the big Oak tree.

Here’s their pet wolf Kujo running after me.

I knew that beast from years before,

And met his owner at their door.

He said he was surprised.

Kujo never bit anyone before!

So now we do the hundred yard dash,

When we see “Sweet Kujo” attacking.

We go from about 20 to 40  miles an hour.

We simply crank it up until our legs start cracking!

Claude
Claude

Let’s rest for a few. Smoke em’ if you got ‘em.

Let’s try to catch our wind.

There’s a county line sign around the curve,

We can pick this up again then!

Right after Dead Man’s Curve,

We’ll attack Oh My God Hill!

Then there will be a counter attack,

In an attempt to destroy my will!

They’ll try to pop me and drop me.

Then they’ll go for the kill!

I guess I’ll attack their counter-attack,

With an attack on Cemetery Hill!

What an endless cycle of battle we face.

Spending endless resources to win a bicycle race.

Be it foe or friend, we’ll battle to the end.

But in the end, it’s not a bad way to screw a friend!

We’ll pass the horses and the sheep,

As we’re coming into town.

I’ll try to shine at the city limit sign,

The group won’t see me coming around.

I’ll start my sprint on the short down-hill,

I’ll use momentum and keep my pedals turning!

My guess? It’ll be about 50 yards from the sign,

My poor body will be crashing and burning!

Oh well you lose some and then you lose some.

And me? Yep, I’ve taken beating after beating.

The things you learn and gain with honest losses,

Cannot be gained or learned from cheating!

Ultimately the “mistress” is the “Bicyclette”!

She’s taking us for a ride. She is the dominant one!

She’s stiff. She’s rigid. She’s cold.

She just takes us along for Her fun!

We can ride Her into the wind,

For a hundred miles or more.

She’ll be ready tomorrow and,

Maybe nudging us out the door.

PBP 1995
PBP 1995

Attend to “oil” of Her squeaks,

Try to tweak “oil” of her tweaks!

If you think her maintenance too high,

Someone else will give Her a try.

PBP 1995
PBP 1995

Take her out for a jolly good romp!

Go ahead, unplug from the MATRIX!

But know darn well, she can take you to hell.

After all- She is the DOMINATRIX!

PBP 1995
PBP 1995

By all means wear helmets! The above pictures were in France. We were not required to wear helmets. Many Europeans ride PBP without helmets. I wanted to be European for a couple days! I'm an ex-Marine. I was in Vietnam. If you think that just wearing a helmet will keep you here- you're delusional! Get ready to go. We're all "going". Having said that -if I had not been wearing a helmet a couple times I would be "out-a-here"!

Go ahead wear a helmet! The smarter you are - The better your helmet should be!

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