The Once-Stunning Mish Mosh Poprikosh

Yes, sad to say — and, I'm sure, quite hard to believe one's very own eyes — but indeed this bone-weary, blowsy and bedraggled Bohemian is that once-stunning Hungarian ingénue, pride of the European magazine circuit, Ms. Mish Mosh Poprikosh.

Propelled to film stardom at the tender age of 15, this precociously zaftig nymphette from the tiny town of Esztergom, near the Slovakian border, played a lead role in but one major film (or should I say, 'flop'). She assumed the starring role of the pure and unattainable buxom love object MiMo in Italian Director Federico Fellini’s 1966 moody masterpiece, 8-1/4. Though conceived as a revealing prequel to his world-renowned 8-1/2 of 1963, the film did not fare nearly half as well, and has since faded into deserved obscurity.

Alas, Mish Mosh has faded into obscurity as well. At first, MiMo was the toast of Cannes. Her barely concealed physical attributes were displayed atop the 45-foot-long chilled shrimp buffet at MGM's opening night bacchanalia, in lieu of an ice-carving. The paparazzi were out in full force that night, and soon provocative poses of the pouting Ms. Poprikosh could be found on the covers of scores of fashion and celebrity magazines around the globe. Newspapers could not get enough of her teasing postures, and the TV air waves sizzled with rumored scandal involving the nubile native of Esztergom. (In the Internet age, she would easily outscore Psy's latest video in hit rat, as well as Ashton's twitter followers.)

However, due to the dearth of meaningful movie roles for women past the age of 15-1/2, and once the many jaded cameras began to turn to the next naked newbie sensation, Ms. Poprikosh finally abandoned the life of an actress altogether, becoming, successively, a make-up girl, a wardrobe dresser, a seamstress, a laundress, a dog walker, a poodle groomer, a veterinarian's assistant, a postmistress, a traffic warden, a civil servant, a waitress, a bar girl, a catering coordinator, a chef’s assistant, a dishwasher, a housemaid, and finally a charwoman at an East Liverpool boarding house, where she still toils today, scrubbing the floors of the occasionally rich and glamorous.