How do you deal with sexual abuse?

Jump to Last Post 1-2 of 2 discussions (12 posts)
  1. profile image0
    Marie-AnneLeClercposted 7 years ago

    What are ways to heal the scars of sexual abuse?

    1. profile image0
      Marie-AnneLeClercposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Should you report all people that sexualy abuse you?

      1. CASE1WORKER profile image63
        CASE1WORKERposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        It depends on the individual, you have to be prepared to answer lots of questions and be prepared for upset- especially if the abuser is a family member.

        1. profile image0
          Marie-AnneLeClercposted 7 years agoin reply to this

          Thank you case1worker, I do have a history of sexual abuse, though I thought I had worked through this & felt that I had come out of the 'horror' & trauma of it all.... Only I have this neighbour who is an alcoholic but is nice when he want to be... He is at leat 20 plus yrs than me.  He has appologised and then takes time in manipulating me by giving me presents and seeing that i'm ok to wantig to share talks with him etc; & then finaly he has repeated the same act in deliberately exposing himself & physicaly forcing my hand or head to service him.  I hate this & there is no excuse... 

          During my time of rape & sexual abuse I have also met men that would Never do such things...  but I feel really repulsed by men, because of all the abuse & rape...

          1. profile image0
            Marie-AnneLeClercposted 7 years agoin reply to this

            Not only this I feel that I should report him since he knew exactly what he was doing, & manipulated me into giving back my trust etc; & when he got that back he repeated the same act... There is no forgiveness in this... ..and this been the thread of these type of people they wish to dominate or are just completely 'social rapists!'

            1. profile image0
              Marie-AnneLeClercposted 7 years agoin reply to this

              My relationships since the early times of rape & abuse has been with women. I don't regret this at all... I am open to what ever happens.... though I am sick & tired with men sexually abusing me...

              1. CASE1WORKER profile image63
                CASE1WORKERposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                You don't have to put up with this.
                It is not your fault!
                You don't have to report him if you don't want to, but don't take his presents, don't speak to him and don't associate with him.
                I repeat, it is not your fault..........not all men are like it.................be brave and make YOUR decision and then go with it- don't hang around and hope he will change- he might do but not with you.
                You dont have to be the victim!

                1. profile image0
                  Marie-AnneLeClercposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                  I will do this I have to be stronger, he is my neighbour downstairs, but before my mother just recently died she said to stay away from him, she knew very well what was going on... & I agree Not all men are like this but he has two sides... I have to realize that he is not sincere at all & you do not do these filthy acts towards women... I should report him to the police but I don;t have evidence... Point is I will Not haven anything to do with him... If he again try to apologise & say that he was drunk that's not true, I was in a room full of people when I said I was leaving, he then walked me out side & shut the door behind & then forced his disgusting sexual acts upon me he grabbed my hand and pushed my head and I could not move back because he was much stronger than me. Eventually I made my escape.... but would a normal man do this? I doubt it he's sick - I should of opened the door & then Everyone would of seen him exposed, wish I had done this at the time... I hate him & feel so sickened by this act... and yet he is sitting there in no way affected and just acting if everything is normal;;;, I hate this man!!!!

  2. Jonathan Janco profile image66
    Jonathan Jancoposted 7 years ago

    Marie, I'm very sorry that you have gone through this. Such horrible things should never have to happen to anyone. However, just discussing the issue is a huge step. Another thing I think would be important would be to forgive yourself for being trusting in regard to this person who manipulated you back into his trust only to once again betray it. It seems from the words you use that that is particularly traumatic for you. I wish you the very best in overcoming this horror. I dealt with a lot of emotional abuse and brutality from my stepdad when I was a child. Im 37 now and forgiveness is still a serious challenge. I hope very much you can overcome your fear of trusting people and that you can find peace.

    1. profile image0
      Marie-AnneLeClercposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      No I'm going to have to reprort him. This just happened again less than  days's ago. I feel sick, violated, abused, and sooo angry. While he sits there in his house unaffected. His also been very possessive of me and if he has ever found out that I have dated anyone he then calls me a whore & a slut.... I hate this man.... I am trying to move away from here so I can be free!!!

      1. CASE1WORKER profile image63
        CASE1WORKERposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        Good! Go report him! Don't worry about the evidence, even if nothing can be proved now it will be recorded and he may try it on some other woman where there is evidence and your report would help in her case. Try and move or ask any girl friends over to stay, or simply go out early, if he drinks a lot he will be up later- try and get in without him knowing and dont answer the door- if he creates a disturbance then some one else is bound to report the noise.

        1. profile image0
          Marie-AnneLeClercposted 7 years agoin reply to this

          I will, apparently there have been other women who have had similar experiences, one in particular was an old Greek women who used to live upstairs, & she did report it but they must of thought she was mad because of her age... Though I was not amused considering what I already knew, other women that had been there just on & off reported the same stuff... I also saw him outside the flat exposing & playing with himself whilst looking up and being well exposed to a young vietnamese women who had young children & a baby... She must of seen him down there doing his thing...

          I sincerely think that I should report him to the police as a sex offender..
          He has No excuse & is highly manipulative and doesn't seem to feel any remorse for his actions... I also remember onetime hearing some young teenage girls screaming as they walked past his house one time, & they were screaming things like  OMG what a filthy dirty old dog etc; - well he must of exposed himself at the time... Must be sick - what else?

 
working

This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

Show Details
Necessary
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Features
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Marketing
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Statistics
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)