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- Relationship Problems & Advice
Get Your Love Back
In relationships today so many couples are struggling to stay together. I find more and more it’s those that have been together 15, 20, 25, 30 plus years. Now at this point one would think these couples have it down packed. I listened to a talk show where a person said, “In every relationship at some point along the way couples fall out of love.” When that is the case, here’s the problem when that does happen. There are those couples that choose not to work on it and put all their efforts into themselves, their own wants, their own lives, their own thoughts and feelings and then there are those who choose to work on their relationship and work on getting what they had back.
To some people it does matter, where others only themselves matter. Over years because of so many distractions many couples grow apart. There’s inner resentments, there’s private hurts that has never been resolved, there’s children disagreements, financial disagreements, there’s many hours spent at work, there’s TV and the list can go on and on. In the midst of all of this that loving flame has intensely cooled down. You can choose to get it back. Here goes that word again; it takes hard “WORK”, willingness, patience and commitment and one really big word “COMMUNICATION.”
Understand I am speaking about those relationships that as time have gone by; these couples have slowly gone in separate and different directions. I am not referring to those couples that have suffered years of emotional or physical abuse and have finally gotten to the point where they won’t take it anymore. I am ONLY writing about those that “Lost” that special something they once had. I have a saying “True love is never lost love.”
In the beginning you saw something outstanding in that special someone that brought you two together in the first place. Now write it down and every day look at it and try to remember. While doing that why not try and bring that love you remember back. You didn’t loose that love overnight and you may not get that feeling back overnight. Patience is a great factor. When you begin to communicate again don’t focus on what the other person has done to you. Focus on how you as individuals can make it better.
I think one of the biggest issues to deal with is finger pointing. So many people are so sensitive and instead of looking honestly at themselves they rather pick their partner apart. When things go bad each one in the relationship has played a part. Some play a bigger part, but, that’s beside the point. The main issue is how to get it back. This takes two people willing and wanting to sit and communicate. Nothing is ever solved by finger pointing.
If you have a spiritual understanding in your family use that to the fullest. There exist so much positive spiritual advice that can help put that love back, even with that there is still work and patience involved. Relationships should never ever be surrounded around one person, a relationship is about two people showing love and being self-sacrificing.
The definition of sacrificing is the sacrifice of ones personal interest or well being for the sake of others. Another says for the benefit of others. It’s not that we can’t do it, we do it for our children, we do it for our friends, we do it for our jobs and we do it for our neighbors. Why not do it for our closest neighbor. Again true love is never lost love, but, it takes work to make it real love again.
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