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Infidelity...Reasons Wives Cheat

Updated on November 23, 2011

One of the biggest reasons that parnters divorce in today’s world is infidelity, Wives are just as likely to stray from the marriage as their husbands, and knowing the most common reasons may just help you both save your marriage before or even after an affair occurs.

Women cheat for many different reasons from revenge to a neglected heart.

Why Wives Cheat

1. Revenge...

We all know the saying that hell has no fury like a woman scorned. You cheat...she gets even by engaging in the same act. It’s not even always about her husband finding out she’s cheated, sometimes the vengeance act is for her alone. For others it’s a way for the wife to give her husband a dose of his own medicine.

2. Quick out

One of the reasons a partner or wife may cheat is to be caught. So that the breakup of the marriage is sped up and she doesn’t have to talk. This is a communication issue at its core, always work with your partner at building a solid trust that they know they can talk with you about anything and everything.

3. Sex

Boredom in the bedroom can settle into a marriage sometimes without either partner being aware of it straight away, the same time, place and position where she can read your next move like a road map can make the lure of an affair that much more exciting and adventures

No sex

Before the kids, before long hours at work, before sleep was your most prized possession sex was a thing of passion where the whole night was yours alone to lie in each other’s arms. Women like men want to feel wanted, appealing, and still desirable to their partner. Without feeling these things they will be drawn to others who may lavish them in such a way, making her feel like a woman again.

4. Self-esteem.

For many different women sex can be a way of reassuring them, that they are beautiful, worthwhile and desirable. for some to be seen as a woman beyond mother, and caregiver can be the very thing that drives a woman to another, is to this need be seen as more then what the role of marriage has made her, that may send her to another.

To have someone listen to her dreams and ideas can be refreshing when she feels over looked at home.

Other women can only gain self-esteem in the bedroom feeling that’s the only place they are able to be loved.

5. Emotional Withdrawal

Women are emotional creatures, and the instant they sense their partner pulling back with their feelings, they worry. Then the longer it goes on for the lonelier they feel, and when they find themselves cheating they often justify it by pointing to the emotional distance as a sign the relationship with their husband was already over....she was just moving on...

Women need your emotional support as well as your financial support, talk to her about her life and feelings, and trust her with yours.

7. Wife becomes the maid.

Being a wife can lead to many different roles for a wife, housekeeper, accountant, babysitter, taxi driver. This can lead to feeling more like the "help" then the treasured partner she once was. It is easy to take things for granted in a relationship over time. But as the feelings of being neglected over the things she is doing can lead for her to stray especially if her partner spends more time at the pub then helping at home. Being appreciated for small things goes a long way.

8. Lack of Intimacy

This is not about sex; this is about the little touches the romantic gestures you make to her as man to woman. Touching her, cuddling, handholding, kissing. These small things are vital to help a woman stay connected to her partner. If she is not getting it from her husband a wife may look for it elsewhere. After all it’s the little things that fan the fires of chemistry.

Terminal Cheater

Some women (and men) will never understand the damage their cheating does to their partners, they will cheat because they want to, they will cheat because they can, and these women like their male counter parts should in my opinion be sent on their way. Once a cheater always a cheater applies to this small group of the populace.

If infidelity is a problem in your relationship, take the time to let the hurt and anger cool, and seek the help of a profession marriage/ relationship counselor to see if the love you once had can be salvaged.



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    • nighthag profile image

      K.A.E Grove 6 years ago from Australia


      Thanks so much for such a glowing endorsement!!

    • nighthag profile image

      K.A.E Grove 6 years ago from Australia


      Thank you it's always good to have some idea of what outcomes certain situations may bring... Forewarned is forearmed

    • hafeezrm profile image

      hafeezrm 6 years ago from Pakistan

      A good analysis, a cause and effect relationship. Thanks

    • Sun360 profile image

      Sun360 6 years ago

      True and real stuff in here and i believe all you mentioned in here.

    • nighthag profile image

      K.A.E Grove 7 years ago from Australia

      oh I couldn't agree more, marriage should be treated with the utmost respect by both partners, its the best way to honour the promises that were made. thanks for stopping in and taking the time to leave a thoughtful comment... thank you

    • gajanis786 profile image

      gajanis786 7 years ago

      Excellent doubt the above mentioned reasons are the most common reasons for infidelity....I personally think, married life is a two way business and should be regarded in high esteem by both the partners in order to be loyal to each other.Thanks.

    • nighthag profile image

      K.A.E Grove 7 years ago from Australia

      some people unfortunately are serial cheaters and its these type of people that can cause the most pain, but not all should be painted with this brush

    • speedbird profile image

      speedbird 7 years ago from Nairobi, Kenya

      Once a cheater always a cheater, I completely agree with you on that.

    • nighthag profile image

      K.A.E Grove 7 years ago from Australia

      I am so glad you were able to get something out of this :)

      thanks for the thoughtful comments

    • accofranco profile image

      accofranco 7 years ago from L Island

      yeah you are very right, your points are useful in preventing leakages that may lead to infidelity in marriage...thanks, i am so glad to discover vital points here...cute hub!

    • nighthag profile image

      K.A.E Grove 7 years ago from Australia

      cheating is a very hurtful thing to do, it breaks hearts so quickly, but understanding the top reasons for it may help couples avoid creating the environment where one or the other is tempted outside of the relationship..

      thanks so much for taking the time to read over this

    • accofranco profile image

      accofranco 7 years ago from L Island

      that last thing any reasonable wife should do is to cheat in order to fact there is no justification for either parties to cheat, more especially a wife...because they have a lower sex drive than men, and are not easily moved at the sight of a masculine body as men do when they see a slender looking female all, a wife has no good reason to cheat. thanks for sharing....nice tips...

    • nighthag profile image

      K.A.E Grove 7 years ago from Australia

      I am glad to hear that this was useful, So many underestimate the need for physical intimace's on behalf of women, In some cases they need it more then their husbands, the affection it brings a balm to a weary soul.

      but it always surprised me when those sorts of comments are made by women in this so called modern age...

      Thank you so much for leaving a comment, I found it very insightful...thank you

    • kbennett51770 profile image

      kbennett51770 7 years ago

      I wrote a hub, Confessions of an Attention Starved Wife, which is a true insight from a woman (me) about what I'm dealing with presently in my marriage. While I don't believe in infedility and would never entertain the notion, you hit the nail on the head with a womans feelings and emotions when her heart and physical needs are neglected.

      My hubpage received a few comments from women that were not very nice. I attribute this to not actually understanding what the hub was about and being ashamed of their own sexuality.

      Very useful hub! Thanks :)

    • nighthag profile image

      K.A.E Grove 7 years ago from Australia

      :) some women are quite devious when it comes to #1, the cheating is a little secret for them to enjoy and having their partner blissfully unaware of it is part and parcel of that...

      thanks so much for your comment, Cheating has always been in society and i think it always will be, but understanding the how and the whys of it all can go a long way to protecting ones self

    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 7 years ago

      Very true.

      The strange thing about #1 is they pretend like they've forgiven the guy. LOL!

      As long as cheating is cheaper and less complicated than divorce more people are likely to consider it to be the better option when it comes to filling gaps in their marriage.

    • nighthag profile image

      K.A.E Grove 7 years ago from Australia

      unfortunately some people cant think past their own wants and are blind to the impact that it will have on those closest to them.

      Understanding the reasons your partner may cheat, can sometimes be the first step in healing and i wish your friend well in his journey..

      thank you so much for the vote up and the comment.

    • chinemeremz profile image

      chinemeremz 7 years ago

      Thanks nighthag, your number 9 point (for terminal cheaters) sounds very fascinating and at the same time disturbing. Many women cheat because the feel is a vogue thing and for them to be seen as keeping up with the joneses, they need to join the bandwagon. I wont forget to stumble this hub and also email to a friend of mine who presently is in a situation, and it is my believe that this hub could act as an elixir in healing his damaged ego.

    • nighthag profile image

      K.A.E Grove 7 years ago from Australia

      Infidelity can be a complex issues, knowing the most common reasons that your partner cheats just may help in both avoidance and healing after the fact.

      thanks for stopping by :)

    • profile image

      hubpageswriter 7 years ago

      These reasons are as real as they get. Good hub and the exploration of the reasons why wives cheat and resort to infidelity.