Where is the line between being loving and gracious but not being walked over or

1. 59

   Hannah David Ciniposted 9 years ago

   Where is the line between being loving and gracious but not being walked over or taken advantage of?
   
   it is a kindness to have a little grace because nobody is perfect and generosity is surely an admirable quality. Where do you draw the line however?

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2. 58

   Maranda Maeposted 9 years ago

   I personally draw the line based on how the other person is acting towards me, of course there are special circumstances where someone is given a little bit of slack. For the most part, if I attempt to be genuinely kind and gracious, and the other person is taking no effort to act in the same manner, I'll continue to be courteous, because that's how I was raised, but that's about it.

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3. 93

   linfcorposted 9 years ago

   I think that being loving towards someone is a choice that we consciously make, but any relationship has to be a give and take situation. When you are doing all the giving and the other person is doing noting but taking, that's where it's time to re-evaluate the situation.

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   1. 59

      Hannah David Ciniposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      I very much agree with the give & take. I think there comes a point when you have to step back from  helping someone who isn't helping themselves.  Do you think it needs to be equal give & take or can it be a healthy relationship but more one

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4. 83

   tsmogposted 9 years ago

   This probably does not make sense, but IMHO there isn't a line . . .  there is space. Or, when the recipient of grace and love is not gracious and loving with receiving it then it kinda' becomes demanding. Time for some space or a time of pause. I know . . . does not make sense :-)

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   1. 59

      Hannah David Ciniposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      I think I agree with you...it is so hard to make a fast rule because there are always 'if...'s and 'but...'s.  Sometimes space and distance can take the pressure off and make it easier to decide where to draw boundaries.

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5. 79

   dashingscorpioposted 9 years ago

   Only (you) can define what that line is.
   Life is a personal journey.
   Each of us has our own "deal breakers" or boundaries. Nevertheless those people who lack self-esteem or confidence are more likely to bend over to appease others rather than risk confrontation or quit associating with them. They'd rather be liked than be happy.
   Each of us gets to (choose) our own friends, lovers, and spouse.
   We get to (choose) whom we spend our time with.
   All "healthy relationships" have some give and take. The more you know someone the easier it should be to recognize what they're uncomfortable with and vise versa unless they don't care.
   "Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary."
   - Oscar Wilde
   The word may not owe you anything but you owe yourself the world!

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6. 61

   fpherj48posted 9 years ago

   The line between being loving & gracious but Not walked over or taken advantage of is WHERE EACH INDIVIDUAL DRAWS THAT LINE, makes it clear and obvious and insists that it is there for reasons and needs to remain there.   We are treated as well or as poorly as WE ALLOW ourselves to be treated.

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