Why did my ex hurt me very badly when I did nothing wrong. Now we not together a

1. 58

   allybobposted 10 years ago

   Why did my ex hurt me very badly when I did nothing wrong. Now we not together and I pine for him
   
   My ex hurt me and now we separated as we carnt be together. I should hate him for what he's done but I still love him and want some advice on how to start getting over him. I know I need to stop thinking of what we had before???  My family are unhappy cos I am so I need to be me again but don't know how to get back to how I was before. This is destroying me inside. I know time a healer but I hurt so much. I thought he loved me. He is  even trying to control me now from where he is even though I know why he trying to play the sorry card. How do I forget him and move on quickly.?

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2. 72

   dashingscorpioposted 10 years ago

   Essentially your question is: " How do I forget him and move on quickly?'
   The reality is if you were "in love" there's no such thing as "quickly".
   All you can do is change your daily focus on things you want to achieve for yourself. More often than not there were friends, hobbies, and other interests you had prior to entering into your last relationship which you may have neglected. Now is the time to get back to being who you were. Check out Meetup.com for hobby/interest groups.
   Right now you can't imagine your life without this man. However it's important to keep things in perspective. There are over 7 Billion people on this planet and half of them are female.
   They've managed to live their lives without him! In fact you had a life (before) you met him! Your future lies ahead of you not behind you.
   In order for him to be "the one" he would have to see you as being "the one". At the very least a "soul-mate" is someone who actually wants to be with you! (And vice versa). Stop romanticizing the past!
   Lastly "closure" is overrated. There is nothing your ex can say or do that would make you feel better about having your heart broken! Any so called advice or recommendations he has for you are useless. It makes no sense to change yourself for an ex!
   The reason why he dumped you or mistreated you could be the very reason why the next man falls madly in love with you!
   Know yourself, (Love yourself), and Trust yourself!
   The world may not owe you anything but you owe yourself the world!
   The goal is to find someone who will love and appreciate you for who you already are. If you need to make major changes to "make a relationship work" it means you're with the wrong person!
   "Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary."
   - Oscar Wilde
   Anyone who attempts to change or control you doesn't think you're all that "special". When someone is "in love" with you they want to avoid anything that would cause them to risk losing you.

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