hiya, i am new here. I am very sad and fraustrate so i signed here as i need to

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   sadgurl007posted 14 years ago

   hiya, i am new here. I am very sad and fraustrate so i signed here as i need to talk or share my fee
   
   hi,i got married last oct in the uk and had to go back to canada for paper work. in the mean time my husband had a cyber affair.at last he found out she was under aged so he stopped contacting her.in jan09 he came to canada for our wedding reception then both came back to uk.he started chatting with different girls in msn n flirting.he is a very caring person n girls tend to fall for him. then i found out that he goes in xxx website when i take a shower or sleep or go out.he promised me that he wouldn't but he keeps on.plus he has a sever drinking problem. i'm sick n tired of everything so my

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2. 53

   sadgurl007posted 14 years ago

   question contined from above as i didnt have much space...
   
   i'm sick n tired of everything so my parents is calling me back to canada forever.he says not to leave him and he cries.well, after all this i still love him too. i know it will be hard for me to start from the beginning again but i guess i have to move on. what should i do?

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   Kobyposted 14 years ago

   I'm answering this to show you the people are listening, but you are the only one that can answer this question.  use your judgment.
   
   Maybe talk to a therapist.  They seem to be good at guiding people in the right direction.

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   HappyHerposted 14 years ago

   I'm so sorry you are struggling with this.  Do they have Al-Anon in your country?  Please find out, or look up online information, it will help you a lot in regard to making decisions when you are effected by someone else's drinking problem.

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   advisor4qbposted 14 years ago

   Read my hubs on "Narcissism in a Nutshell," and "Taking Care of Yourself," sister.  You can either accept the way he is or walk away. I also recommend Al-Anon, but I would suggest that you bail now while you can before you catch an STD from this cheater.  You do not have to accept unacceptable behavior.  Are you waiting until you can bring children into this mess?!! It sounds to me like he just tells you what he knows you want to hear to keep  you hanging around.  Sure sounds like a sneaky perv, waiting until you are busy to go onto those websites.  Caring is not quite the word I would use.  You should at least be thinking about what you are going to do to get yourself into a better situation.  You need to think about yourself.  You are worth more than that.

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   Lady_Eposted 14 years ago

   Sorry to hear your going through such a hard time. The people above have given good advice.  The positive side of this is that you do not have kids yet, so it wouldn't be too hard to leave but tell him if you want to leave and see his reaction.  However, the thing is if you continue with him, your mind will never be at rest. You'll constantly be wondering what he is up to. Do you think you can ever trust him again?
   
   Hope you find a solution and happiness returns to your life.
   Good Luck, Elena.

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   solarcaptainposted 14 years ago

   Question:  My boyfriend is an alcoholic and sometimes  he cheats on me  and he abuses me.  He accuses me of cheating but I never have. I am sure that I love him, what should I d
        
     It's evident that this problem you have described is... read more

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   windflareposted 14 years ago

   I'm sorry this is happening to you - but since it is, why stay in an abusive relationship where your husband is fooling around in cyber space?  Would you stick around if he was fooling around in the next apartment or town?  It's the same thing -- or will be.  I know my response must sound on the mean side to you, but I don't mean it that way.  Just want to give you common sense advice. Good luck.

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   kikirose2009posted 14 years ago

   Hi. It sounds like your husband needs some kind of counseling. He has a couple of addictions and you cant help him. The first thing he needs to do is he needs to admit that he needs help because he is the only one that can make the change for your marriage. It isnt going to get any better I have been where you are believe me it isnt fun. You can look into groups called ALANON they are like AAA but they are for families that are dealing with loved ones with addictions and it helps them understand the disease because that is what it is. There are places you can find on the internet and they have meetings and times , check them out and I hope this will help you out. You just keep working on you and dont let him get inside your head and make you think you are not good enough because that will be the next thing he will try to do ok. take care..kikirose2009

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    shafiqahmedposted 13 years ago

    It is a common problem of the women around the world. So, u should ignore it. If it intensifies, u need a psychotherapist for your husband.

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