Why Do Many Husbands, Unlike Wives, Dread The Talk About How To Improve Their Marriages?
A mention of, ‘we need to talk’, seems to make him retreat to the computer, television, newspaper, or out of the blues he has something very urgent that need his attention immediately. Does this burying of the head in the sand help them much?
I am a husband, and your observation seems very accurate. Many men, and i think most men, have a direct, physical, approach as a primary, first, response/way of behaving. And talking is not direct and physical and hence NOT a well practiced, and competent, method of doing a thing [to end in a winning position]. Men, [being one], from their [my] own point of view, need to win.
Hint : Hence men lean toward explaining things.
Perhaps in place of "We need to talk" [I am in control and this is how I woud like it to go] ...
'I would very much enjoy/love to understand how this [ marriage aspect ] would be from your view point. I see [this] but it might be [that] and i really do need to know.'
Or, less directly. Betty needs to understand how Barney can ... I tried to explain it but just haven't been able to completely explain it.
I love to solve things, I can solve. Which means I have to see there is a problem and that it can be resolved.
So many men are emotionally influenced, but have so little ability or Subtlety with emotions.
Not an answer, but maybe a glimps into dim places. regards, allan
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