Why do 18+ girls go after the 30+ married men?
What is it about a middle-aged married man that attracts the younger girls? Don't they see that they are destroying a marriage? my son-in-law is 35, married with 3 children, and this girl is 18. She gets the gifts, dinners (with my grandbabies in tow), rides in the car (he is teaching her how to drive), while my daughter is at work.
This is such a strange topic. But... There is someone in my neighborhood who is aged around 40. He is dating/engaged to a girl that is aged 19. I heard that when she moved in, they argued about who was going to do laundry. When you are in high school, age is a Huge difference. If you dated someone 4 years apart from you, you were different, and the relationship was awkward. If you are out of college, and have a job- its another story. My parents are 9 years apart. I think age does matter, but when there is more than a 15 year difference, I think more things like money and insurance come into play. It's just a rare and confusing subject to talk about.
Security, financial stability, sexual experience, stability, maturity (less games than guys their age). And that's just at the top of my head. I'm sure there are some who go out with older men for psychological reasons like father figures they never had, etc. Being married is just the icing on the cake. It's a trophy for some your women to get him away from his wife. I would assume it's a bit of an ego boost as well. I'm sure he isn't complaining. Why are these older married men after these younger girls? It takes two here. He is the adult in this scenario, therefore he is responsible and mostly at fault. He's also the one with the responsibility to his wife and children. I don't want to sound rude but this 18 year old girl doesn't owe your daughter a thing. She's practically a child herself. She's only looking out for her own gain and if he's buying her things without the stress of watching his kids, then she's going to do it. The guilty one here is the husband. Your daughter needs to kick him to the curb and fast before he brings home an STD.
It is strange, rare but it does happen. May be the financial stability, behavioral maturity attracts some girls. I think it becomes a problem in adjustments later on for both of them. After getting married the infatuation ends and the problems arise. This may not be true always, but rather than the girl the man should visualize the consequences, as he is the more experienced one.
A large part of being young is only being concerned with yourself.
A teenager does not think about the spouse, children, and possible outcomes. They are "living in the moment". They enjoy the attention, the money being spent on them or gifts given to them, a more experienced/better sexual partner...etc Also most 30 year old men don't behave much older than 22 year old guys. Therefore neither the girls or the guy considers himself to be "middle aged". Everything these days is the "new" something. 50 is the new 40, 40 is the new 30, and 30 is the new 20.
An 18 year old girl sees a man who is in great shape driving a nice car and has a career compared to her 18 year old male counter part who is living in his parent's basement, getting high, playing video and fart games with his friends....etc It's not even a real competition! Lastly the mind of 18 year old believes they are an "adult" and age is just a number! The moral issue is the real problem for (both) people involved. An affair can only take place if (both) people say "yes". Your question could have just as easily been; "Why do married men age 30+ pursue 18 year old girls?" (It takes two)
I guess this is a question only a girl can answer but for what it's worth, I think its about security.
I have this belief that girls go after older married men because they feel more secure. Most men of this age would have a car, a house, a family and a stable, secure lifestyle - something I believe most females want.
Is this the same guy that spends so much time online?
I think the 18 year old girl is looking for a sugar daddy, and wants to be a mom, but needs practice with other children first. If this 35 year old man can't leave the kids out of it, he's pretty pathetic. Especially having these babies in the car when she's still learning how to drive. So is this what he's teaching his grand children? That if you're a man, you can have affairs, and keep a sugar mama and a mistress? And if you're a woman, it's okay to have your heart broken by a man who cheats?
It's too bad that a teen crush can have such an impact... It's actually quite normal, say in a college setting that an 18-20 year old student has a crush on their 30-something professor, but usually it just stays that, a crush.
I think your son in law is going through a mid life crisis that is not even in existence, and is too young for. Someone needs a backbone.
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