Should young teens date older guys?? For example 14 age girl 18 or over age guy

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  1. brakel2 profile image79
    brakel2posted 6 years ago

    Should young teens date older guys??  For example 14 age girl 18 or over age guy?

  2. prowlingginger profile image39
    prowlinggingerposted 6 years ago

    I don't think they should, but being a young teenager 100 years ago, they typically do cause it makes them feel more mature and important I guess

    1. profile image0
      Courtney Burkeposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      100 years ago, "teenagers" did not exist. You were a child and then you were not. It wasn't that they felt more mature but that they were more mature due to societal pressures.

  3. lburmaster profile image81
    lburmasterposted 6 years ago

    I think for girls under 16, they should date guys only a few years ahead of them. Like 16 versus an 18 year old. After 17, they can do basically anything in my book.
    However, you cannot say any teenager with any older male. The situation should be more complicated than that. Focus on their personalities. Will their personalities work out? How close are their mental abilities? What has he done thus far? What has she done thus far? Is her personality a people pleaser? If so, do not let her date older males. If she doesn't care about people, she can date anyone. It all matters on who you are specifically talking about.
    Even after what I have said, I don't know if you want my advice.  A week before my 18th birthday, I started dating a 30 year old. Surprisingly, the relationship is still strong after 2 years. Not pregnant, not living together, I'm a college student, he's a full time worker, we enjoy the same things, we both make great scores, etc. And his mom likes me smile I've never liked one of my boyfriend's mother's before. It's new and interesting.
    Even so, my situation is special and we have personalities that get along easily with each other. By dating someone who is remarkably older than you, you get to learn about things that will come later in life. The importance of saving, gaining friends, doing everything you can at the age you are now (if you're an introvert like me), etc. But also you get the party side of you out sooner.
    If I went to a university, I would be at parties with people doing drugs and having sex. People talking about all of their friends. Others focusing on how to get alcoholic beverages. Etc, etc, etc. I don't want to be around that. So I get the same expansion by visiting him every once in a while. Eventually though, it might burn out because I will have learned all I oculd.

  4. thougtforce profile image91
    thougtforceposted 6 years ago

    No, I don't think they should! It makes me wonder what´s wrong with the guy? A girl at the age of 14 is a girl at 14 and to me it sounds strange that she should be so interesting for a guy at that age. But being a teen parent myself, I know it isn't so easy to stop them from dating either! Unless you lock in the teenage girl, and that isn't possible! Forbidding them to meet can have the opposite effect and only make things worse. So, as a teen parent I think the best thing to do, is to be on your guard and talk with the girl, let her know why you are worried and be there for her if she needs you. That is my strategy, and it has worked so far.

  5. sassydee profile image73
    sassydeeposted 6 years ago

    No way because young teens have a different mental state compared to an older guy or woman.

  6. K. Burns Darling profile image81
    K. Burns Darlingposted 6 years ago

    Take away the issue of possibility of becoming sexually active, the continuing rise of unplanned teen pregnancies, the possibility of catching an STD, the increased risk of exposure to things like alcohol, illicit drug use, and physical and emotional abuse, and I still don't think that young teens should be allowed to date (at least not in the classic sense of the word) period. 
    Should a fourteen year old date someone eighteen or older?  Absolutely not!
    The difference is not just in the number of years, but in terms of life experience.  While the four year difference between a 20 year old and a 24 year old, or a 24 year old and a 28 years old is not huge, when the difference is between  fourteen and eighteen, it is light years.
    I am the mother of a sixteen year old daughter and a seventeen year old son.  House rule since they were babies; You may not date until you are at least sixteen years old. At that time, we will revisit the issue and a decision will be made based upon your level of maturity, and responsibility.  (Our definition of date is as in the classic sense, so this means that you cannot go out, on your own, just the two of you, and no car dates.) 
    I am not naive enough to think that even the toughest parent can stop the evolution of crushes and puppy love, and both of my children had the requisite "boyfriend/girlfriends, that all the other kids had, and that was as it should be, but as I reminded them frequently, you can have as many boyfriends/girlfriends as you like, but you still aren't dating until you're sixteen." 
    Beginning in junior high school, we did allow group dates, school dances, etc. but only with the stipulation that either we, or other parents were doing the picking up and dropping off. 
    They both were allowed to begin dating at sixteen, but there are still rules to follow; No dating anyone who is more than two years older or two years younger than yourself.  No dating anyone that we (Mom & Dad) have not met. (If you can't bring them home to meet us, then we will assume that there is something inappropriate about the relationship that you are trying to keep from us)  and for my daughter, no boy may take her out unless he picks her up at the door. (This is a matter of respect, not to us, but to her,)
    We must know where you are going, if your plans change, call home, if you want to go somewhere afterward, call home.  You may not go to his/her house and hang out unless their is a parent home, and they may not come here and hang out unless their is a parent home.

  7. profile image47
    ethen1234posted 6 years ago

    no that guy would be a fage if he did you shoul date guys the same age as you

    1. profile image0
      Courtney Burkeposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      Hmmm... I would say "in the same age group" rather than "the same age." One or two years is fine as a teenager. Ten years is fine if you are middle aged.

  8. profile image0
    HubTubposted 6 years ago

    Depending upon where this occurs, this kind of activity could possibly fall within the legal boundaries of statutory rape, which is a very serious crime.  I think that would be cause enough to say NO!

  9. deblevey profile image59
    debleveyposted 6 years ago

    Although girls tend to reach physical and emotional maturity milestones at an earlier age than boys, I don't think its a good idea for a 14 year old girl to be dating a guy over the age of 18 for several reasons.Virtually every male on earth is, or at the very least can become highly motivated to achieve sexual conquests, despite the age of the person he is sexually attracted to. This is a biological function of the male gender, and a powerful instinct that not all guys of any age are willing to  resist. In today's complicated society, an education and vocational training are far more important goals for a young girl to be concentrating on than a relationship with an older guy. There is plenty of time for girls to concentrate on romantic partnerships after they finish their educations and get started on achieving vocational goals, which will help them achieve a secure future far better than an older boy friend. In the meantime, it is ok to practice relationship skills by casually dating guys their own age, without focusing on entering a committed relationship before legal adulthood is acheived.

  10. profile image0
    TrinityCatposted 6 years ago

    Absolutely not. It's that time of life where your hormones drives you crazy. What does a 18 year old boy want of a 14 year old girl? I'm sorry to say, but it's a rare case if someone tells me "love".

  11. profile image49
    VJFposted 6 years ago

    When I was 14 ( 1 month away from turning 15) I started dating a 19 year old. I was very mature from my age is some ways and very much my age in other ways.  I did not immediatly tell him my age, but i guess when we did discuss it my age was no longer an issue. I did end up having my first child with him by the age of 17 and a second at 19 and a third by 21!!  We are still happily married to this day and I am now 36 years old. We both have great jobs and a wonderful family......This being said, We have a 14 year old daughter and I asked my husband what would you do if a 19 year old wanted to start seeing you daughter??  He would never allow it! My daughter is nothing like I was at her age (THANK GOD) but looking back at it now I think it is too much for someone her age. She can end up being perfectly happy and love this person for the rest of her life or it can push her to into acting older then she really is.  Every child is different when it comes to making these choices and some 14 year olds are older then others in the way of mentality, but like I said....My husband who dated this 14 year old would never allow his daughter to do it,  whats that tell you???

  12. Rebecca2904 profile image77
    Rebecca2904posted 5 years ago

    I actually had this conversation with my family a little while ago. I'm 21 and my boyfriend is 13 years older than me, but even so the emotional age and level of maturity between us is much more similar that between a 14 year older and an 18 year old. I was 18 just three years ago, I'd already left home and was living abroad, dating guys and just generally leading an adult life. When I was 14 I was... I can't even really remember! I think I was dating a boy who was 15 and though we may have kissed occasionally (and rather chastely) we weren't really much more than friends.
    What an 18 year old and what a 14 year old will expect from a relationship are two very different things (or at least they should be). Even if the 14 year old is mature for their age, I don't think it's okay - they should still be allowed to grow up in their own time. Talking to my family about this subject, we decided the only situation when we think it would be okay is if the 18 year old was perhaps a little disabled and had the emotional age of a 14 year old.

  13. royalblkrose profile image61
    royalblkroseposted 5 years ago

    in the us, such a combination is known as 'STATUATORY RAPE"- even if the girl wants to be with the boy in question.  even if it were not legally wrong, it is still a dangerous situation, especially for the girl- girls that age are quite immature- and not mentally or emotionally able to be aware of being manipulated, bullied or emotionally abused.
    and any 18 yr old that would want to get involved with that 14 year old should be investigated by the local constabulary.

  14. cloverleaffarm profile image76
    cloverleaffarmposted 5 years ago

    Only if the boy wants to register as a pedophile for the rest of his life.

 
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