Women is our vulnerability an excuse?

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   dejajolieposted 15 years ago

   Wanting to do the right thing but torn between wanting to be a "good Samaritan" and  being a vulnerable woman, what would you have done?
   
   *Sitting in my car at a light I observed a homeless man fall to the groung on the sidewalk. I wanted to help him and see if he was ok but it was  dark, I was not in a good part of town and I was in the center lane. I tried to honk my horn to get the attention of the car next to me, to alert them but to no avail. My light turned green and I drove away. I have been battling this over and over in my head because I wanted to stop but thought I would be putting myself in a compromising position. Am I wrong, what would you have done?*

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      cosetteposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      i would have driven until i could get to a lane to turn around, then stayed in my car and dialed 911. this way i'm safe in case he has a knife or is psychotic and he gets help in case he is sick and not a drunk or something.
      
      that being said, you did what was right for you. i just know myself and what i would do.
      
      i hate it when this kind of stuff happens. a few times i have encountered children who were obviously being abused by their parents and wanted so badly to intervene...i did once or twice...then i started thinking what if i made it worse for the child later, when they got home? it's a real struggle. when i feel this way i tell myself i know i can't save the world and try to move past it to save my sanity

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   2. 48

      lindsay champagneposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      You could have pulled over and called 911 or found a nearby opeen business and called from there. Hopefully the man was okay in the end. I'm not saying you should have gotten out of your car or anything and put yourself in immediate danger, like you said it wasn't in a good part of town, but there are other ways you could have helped him.  I understand that in the moment you have to think on your toes and you didn't have that much time to react but I must say i'm glad I wasn't the man on the street that night. Maybe with all the suggestions you're getting on here you'll be better prepared next time.

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   archdawposted 15 years ago

   You did the right thing as a woman alone at night.  Why bring danger to yourself.

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   lyricsingrayposted 15 years ago

   I hate vulnerable - it is an excuse

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   1. 48

      lindsay champagneposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      I agree. The only women who are vulnerable are the ones who make themselves vulnerable.

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   Volkhposted 15 years ago

   In my opinion you did the wrong thing. You seem to be having some kind of crisis of conscience about it. You obviously wanted to help the guy, but didn't, and now you regret it.
   
   Is it right for one person to help another person when they need it? Well of course it is. Is it right for the bum in the story to pull a knife, or pick your pocket, or grope you obscenely as you help him up? No, of course not, but that's the world we live in.
   
   A conscience isn't worth much if your actions are ruled by fear. However, often times doing the wrong thing can still be doing the smart thing. I wouldn't lose any sleep over it.

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5. 70

   TINA Vposted 15 years ago

   In my opinion, nobody can say if you did the right or wrong thing.  It is you who can make a thorough analysis of what happened.  It is good to help others but you should also think of your safety.  I suggest that you stop worrying about it, pray for that man and pray for guidance too.  There are still a lot of chances that you can help other people. Goodluck!

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6. 60

   dejajolieposted 15 years ago

   Thanks all and Thanks Tina, I have helped people in many situations similar to this, however am always reluctant when it's night, i'm alone and in a bad area. I am the one who chases stray dogs puts them in my car and drop them off at shelters.... I did pray that the police (because the area is heavily patrolled) or someone on the sidewalk came to his aid.

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