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Do you confide in people completely or hold a little bit back?

  1. Lady_E profile image75
    Lady_Eposted 5 years ago

    Do you confide in people completely or hold a little bit back?

    I always think it’s better to hold something back about oneself, (when not talking to close family) so, if anything goes wrong, you don’t feel vulnerable – feeling, as if they have part of your life in their hands. Any thoughts on this?

  2. Alecia Murphy profile image80
    Alecia Murphyposted 5 years ago

    I hold back a little. Some things I feel not everyone needs to know about me. Besides, anyone who tells everything to everyone isn't always that interesting.

    1. fpherj48 profile image75
      fpherj48posted 5 years agoin reply to this

      BRAVO....Alecia.....LOL...I'd like to know what it is about someone who thinks that his/her life is a story that's in demand.....Truthfully?  Who cares?  You're YOU and I'm ME...Now, can we discuss something profound??.....

  3. flashmakeit profile image69
    flashmakeitposted 5 years ago

    I think you should be discrete or keep a distances when communicating with some people because not all people have compassionate thoughts for you..

    1. fpherj48 profile image75
      fpherj48posted 5 years agoin reply to this

      Amen, flash.....on the contrary...."most people" want reason to judge and point fingers.  I say, don't give them that option.

    2. flashmakeit profile image69
      flashmakeitposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      You impressed me fpherj48 by writing that because it is the truth! smile

  4. MickS profile image74
    MickSposted 5 years ago

    I avoid telling too much if anything about myself, my life story is no one's business but my own, I'm not interested in telling it, and I'm not interested in hearing another's life story.

    1. fpherj48 profile image75
      fpherj48posted 5 years agoin reply to this

      And you are also a WISE man!

  5. profile image0
    CJ Sledgehammerposted 5 years ago

    I will only disclose what is prudent and then leave the rest to one's imagination. I tend to be a private person who enjoys privacy. The other issue is the trustworthiness of the parties in question. If people were more trustworthy and honorable, I would be more open to disclosure. But, as things are, I am happy to remain a man of mystery.

  6. edhan profile image61
    edhanposted 5 years ago

    There is no secret between my wife and I. We enjoy our open conversation and entertain ourselves being truthful.

  7. Moms-Secret profile image83
    Moms-Secretposted 5 years ago

    I always saw a crossroads here.  On one side, I would like the impossible... for someone to know all of me.  These days not even family really does.  I don't think it should be a opportunity given to everyone you come across.  That being said, if you happen to be chosen by me, I don't feel vulnerable because I accept my past completely.  If I am not ashamed about it than no one else is given the power to shame me.

    I have been fortunate in that the few that know the most about me have never let me go.  Relationships have changed because that is what life does but I pulled them into me and love them always and they choose to stay there... loved.

    1. fpherj48 profile image75
      fpherj48posted 5 years agoin reply to this

      NO ONE has a right, nor the power to shame you..unless you allow it.   Most people would do well, to tend to their own history.  Keep this in mind before you divulge anything to anyone.

    2. Moms-Secret profile image83
      Moms-Secretposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      I agree with you completely but the fact is that people do lots of things they have no business or right to do.  There are a huge amount of people who believe that judging others is the way to improve themselves.

    3. fpherj48 profile image75
      fpherj48posted 5 years agoin reply to this

      Moms-Secret......I follow what you say.....sounds like you think there are a lot of people who like to know what's negative and bad about others..so they will seem better?  That's SAD as hell!

  8. eternals3ptember profile image60
    eternals3ptemberposted 5 years ago

    I make it seem like I tell everyone everything, but I actually hold back most info. Nobody even thinks to ask questions when they "know" that they "know."

  9. soconfident profile image83
    soconfidentposted 5 years ago

    I tend to hold back, because some people can't be trusted. There was one person I could tell anything though, but we're not together anymore.

  10. profile image0
    huckelburyposted 5 years ago

    Asian cultures believe that each person has three faces. One is the public face we wear among strangers. Another is the face our friends and families see. The third face is the one no one sees. Seems like a practical approach to me.

    1. TNSabrina profile image60
      TNSabrinaposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      Very practical approach! I like it.

  11. fpherj48 profile image75
    fpherj48posted 5 years ago

    Lady_E.......All due respect, why are you "confiding"  in PEOPLE?    WHO do you refer to when you say, "people." .... Friends?  associates? co-workers?  romantic partners?   
    I'm not sure that I would advise nor encourage anyone to self-disclose much of anything about yourself, your life and/or history without a high degree of trust and a solid bond with a person.   There is no reason whatsoever for individuals to blab  to just anyone. No one needs to feel compelled to kneel before a confessional. 
    We all have a right to privacy (whatever privacy we have left in this world) and you need to remember, if someone needs to know too much about you...perhaps it is THEY who has something to hide.....Keep a lid on some things.  It doesn't hurt to be protective of your self.  In fact, it's a very good idea.

    1. Moms-Secret profile image83
      Moms-Secretposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      This brings me to the second thing that I agree with.  Be selective in who you choose.

    2. fpherj48 profile image75
      fpherj48posted 5 years agoin reply to this

      Best rule of thumb?  Develop the practice of discussing "ideas"....impressive events and matters of general interest & importance.  I can't think of anything more useless or mundane, than discussing each other....or anyone else, for that matter!

  12. SidKemp profile image96
    SidKempposted 5 years ago

    I like huckleberry's answer, and it describes what I have found works for me. I am a creative and complex person. I used to be completely open. But I met with a lot of incomprehension, and more than a little fear and attack. I am completely honest, but I only share what it feels safe to share, and that is different for each person. Some people are supportive of my creativity and not my spirituality, and vice-versa. So I protect my inner heart and creative process. But I don't hide the fact that I do that. Everyone who knows me knows that there is more to discover, an endless array of surprises as they stay with me. And I think we're all like that.

  13. nanderson500 profile image83
    nanderson500posted 5 years ago

    I hold back, I think just about everyone does at least somewhat.

  14. teaches12345 profile image94
    teaches12345posted 5 years ago

    Depending upon the person, I share what is needed.  The truth is what is essential in sharing.  People will read into what you say whatever they desire if they do not know how to listen well.

  15. teyeger82 profile image77
    teyeger82posted 5 years ago

    There are very few people that I confide in completely. I share more with some than I do with others. Some I tell things to in a general sense but there are very few that I share all of the nitty gritty with.

  16. TNSabrina profile image60
    TNSabrinaposted 5 years ago

    I try to hold back, but I will tell my business if I see it as a way of helping others. I'm at a point in life where I care very little what people think about me in terms of judging. I understand that all humans have issues...hidden or not.

  17. Escobana profile image75
    Escobanaposted 5 years ago

    I confide too easy in anyone even though I have a sense for good and bad people.

    I don't feel vulnerable very easily, I can get naive for sharing too much private information with strangers and if I get hurt for sharing something intimate, I move on and hold back a little bit more.

  18. Esther  Strong profile image84
    Esther Strongposted 5 years ago

    I tend to hold back but occassionally I will suddenly feel drawn to confide more in someone than I actually intended or planned to do.  (Things just kinda spill out of my mouth without without forethought !!!) 

    Luckily I have not come unstuck with this or divulged anthing too embarrassing, YET.

    1. SidKemp profile image96
      SidKempposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you for a simple and beautiful thought.

  19. Lady_E profile image75
    Lady_Eposted 5 years ago

    I hope we are allowed to comment on our Questions. I just want to say "thank you" to everyone who took time to leave a comment. It was useful. (When we have challenges, it's natural that we find one person to confide in for advice).

    1. SidKemp profile image96
      SidKempposted 5 years agoin reply to this

      Yes, you can comment on, or answer your own question! And thank you for inspiring such an honest discussion. I hope everyone else learned as much as I did.

 
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