What are the important things to consider before deciding a breakup?
I know we've been through lots of decisions - from simple to complicated ones. When deciding, it is really important to consider things first before making any actions and implementations. With regards to relationships, can you cite some important factors which can help you decide whether to continue the breakup or not?
The best advise is: Know yourself, Love yourself, and Trust yourself.
You have to know what traits you want, need, or desire in a mate (before) you choose a mate. After all you are responsible for your own happiness.
Answer the following questions; Do we share the same values?, Do we want the same things for the relationship? Do we naturally agree on how to obtain those things? Is there a (mutual) depth of love and desire for one another? For people who feel they have met their "soul-mate" the answers to each of these questions is an easy yes.
Having said that there are other factors to consider such as one's age and station in life. If we are talking about two 15 year olds on the verge of breaking up that is a whole lot different from couples in their late 20s and beyond. Youth is about exploring and learning about yourself and what you want out of life. When we're young we really haven't figured out who we are!
Truth be told most of us fail our way to success when it comes to relationships. Therefore it's unrealistic for the most part to believe any relationships we have in our youth are going to lead to "happily ever after." There is a lot of personal growth and evolution that takes place in our youth.
For those of us who are older we have to figure out (why) we want to breakup. Knowing why helps to avoid choosing the same type of person in the future. Every failed relationship should teach us lessons about ourselves. Did your mate commit a "deal breaker" in your eyes? Have they "changed" or did you "change" since the start of the relationship? Are there traits you wanted in a mate which they do not have but you thought you could live without? Have you reached the conclusion that you can't see yourself spending the "rest of your life" with them and therefore it would be a waste of both of your time to keep letting days, weeks, months, and years float by, Have you fallen (out of love) or desire to be with someone else?, Do you no longer feel loved by your mate?
"There is no amount of work or communication that can overcome being with someone who does not want what you want."
"Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary." - Oscar Wilde
"If you are unhappy in a relationship and (choose) to stay then (you) are choosing to be unhappy."
Awhile back I wrote a hub called A Breakup Method. http://dashingscorpio.hubpages.com/hub/ABreakupMethod
Are you 100% sure that after breakup, you will get a better partner than the present one? Are you sure (if you have already fixed up a partner to get married after divorce) the chosen person will prove to be a better partner after marriage? Are you sure you are financially sound enough to bear the expenses connected with the break up and also build a new family comfortably?
You should break up once you know the reasons and do it right away don't wait to break up, you want out so get out. If you are unhappy in a relationship don't stay and wait for more issues to arise. Walk away and be free from a toxic relationship. Don't be friends after the breakup, Continue the breakup when you don't feel chemistry, communicate don't beat around the bush make sure you know what it is you want from life. If you feel trapped in a relationship then don't stay any longer. A relationship should be called off if you are not sure where you are going with it.Before the break up be positive and clear about what you a going to say the way you are going to break the news.
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