What holds a relationship together?

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   DDEposted 11 years ago

   What holds  a relationship together?
   
   Relationships can be problematic for many couples do you  know what holds a  relationship together? Do you think  love is all you need to form a bond in your relationship?

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   Bubblegum Jonesposted 11 years ago

   Trust is one of the biggest things that holds a relationship together.

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      DDEposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you for answering well thought of trust is crucial.

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   dashingscorpioposted 11 years ago

   What (holds) a relationship together is both people deciding that no matter what happens in their relationship they're not going to walk away! This can be unhealthy or lead to a life of unhappiness. 
   We make the assumption that only (happy) couples stay together.
   However it' not uncommon to learn of someone who has stayed in an abusive relationship for 20 years, or with someone who cheats frequently on them, has a domineering controlling personality, jealous/possessive, withholds affection and sex, lives in separate areas of the house, one person is raging alcoholic/drug addict or completely financially irresponsible.
   If being "happy" is not an important requirement for one to stay in a relationship then it's easy to simply take what comes.
   On the other hand if you do have "deal breakers", believe in standing up for yourself, have boundaries, expectations, and certain requirements then it can be a real challenge to stay in any relationship when you're unhappy/not getting what you want/need.
   "Unconditional love" in relationships is a myth for most of us. In fact we're told it's healthy for us to have "deal breakers" in order to maintain our own self-esteem and love of self. I suppose the question everyone really wants the answer to is;
   How do couples remain happy in long-term relationships?

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      DDEposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you for the well summed up answer.

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   Gypsy48posted 11 years ago

   Besides love there has to be trust and respect for each other if a relationship is to last.

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      DDEposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Love is part of the relationship Thank you for answering

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   chef-de-jourposted 11 years ago

   Love is vital to a stable relationship but some people have their own definition of what love really is! Perhaps nowadays many individuals think love is having material wealth, or enough cash to exist on, or thrive on. Having 'things' like cars and a decent house and enough money for a family's needs is important but for me it's not the most important aspect of a stable relationship. You can have a zillion things in your life but if you don't have a common core of natural love for each other your relationship will struggle and eventually become emptied.
   Natural love is a form of spiritual love based on mutual trust, respect and compromise of the ego. Relationships need to be balanced and must be worked on to achieve the balance, where both partners are individuals yet working hard together as a team. Natural love I think functions best when there's common ground between a couple ....this could be a mutual interest, a sense of destiny, a love of something greater.....it can even extend to a sense of humour.
   If you can keep this energy alive then there's nothing can break it but the ego has to be controlled and the love become a sharing in practice.

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      DDEposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      A great answer, keeping the energy alive is so important. Thank you.

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