How to explain death to a 9 year old so he can understand and be able to deal wi

1. 50

   erose121posted 14 years ago

   How to explain death to a 9 year old so he can understand and be able to deal with it
   
   how to explain to a child why god has taken his great grandfather and now only 6 months after his greatgrandmother is dying. He has just stopped crying about his grandfather, how do I explain?

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2. 70

   sarascaposted 14 years ago

   Explain it the same way I explained it to my daughter when she was 5 years old and lost her great-grandmother, whether you are a spiritual/religious person or not.  What matters are NOT your personal beliefs but alleviating an emotional situation for a child.
   
   I told my daughter that her great-grandmother had gone to Heaven because God needed some extra angels to help take care of people in Heaven, and that her great-grandmother was now an angel and was watching over her every day.
   
   My step-daughter's children are 4 and 2 and lost their daddy right after the youngest was born...she explained it to the oldest by saying that God needed their daddy to help take care of little kids in Heaven.  Every year on the daddy's birthday, my step-daughter will let her kids write messages on helium balloons (and we do it, too, to give the idea more oomph in the kids' minds) to their daddy and then we go out into the yard and let the balloons go.  The kids think the balloons go all the way to Heaven and get read by their dad.  It makes them feel better, and that's what matters.

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3. 80

   angela_michelleposted 13 years ago

   Be honest. That is really the only way to let them know. Use direct words like died, dead, not passed away. It sounds like he is very aware what death is. Maybe do something to show someway to say goodbye, to help with closure, yet also a way to remember them. Also, listen. Don't do most of the talking, let him talk about how sad he is. Remind him of memories, and see what he remembers. My daughter lost her dad, and though it has been three years, we still will have nights where I just need to listen to tears, and hear what she has to say.

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